Spring Flowers (1)

The dawn that seemed like it would last forever had passed, and a new morning arrived.

Clearing away the darkness of past times, the sunrise noisily dyes the silent world.

Along with the storm of light streaks raging outside the window.

I woke up.

“Ugh, uhh…”

A fierce hangover barged into my hazy consciousness.

A single groan escaped at the onrush of pain.

I lifted my eyelids.

As I furrowed my brow at the throbbing headache, a familiar ceiling came into view through the blurry haze.

“……Morning, huh.”

Muttering dazedly, I raised my body, which had been buried in the bed.

Was it because I’d drunk so heavily after so long?

The sluggish exhaustion I felt all over weighed me down.

I should have controlled myself a little…

It seemed like the problem was getting carried away with the mood and chugging it down.

‘I wonder if Father is alright.’

Father definitely would have had double the amount of alcohol that I did.

I pondered the faint worry, exhaling a breath soaked in hangover.

“Haa… my head feels like it’s breaking.”

I felt like if I stayed still, the headache would only get worse, so I got up.

I splashed some water on my face to shake off the sleepiness.

Then I pulled back the covers.

Just like that, as I tried to get out of bed with wobbly legs…

“Hmm… young master…”

I heard a familiar voice somewhere.

A sudden wave of dissonance.

I tilted my head, turning towards the source of the sound.

My gaze landed right beside me.

The spot where the pillow I had been hugging was lying.

And there… lay a girl with brown hair who absolutely shouldn’t have been there.

“Rachel…?”

Why is she here?

The question arose in my mind.

The events of last night flashed through my head with a *shwirrr* sound.

As the short, fragmented pieces of memory were pieced together one by one, I couldn’t shake the shock.

‘…So what I was hugging last night…’

A sweet scent and a warm sensation.

I had fallen asleep, intoxicated by it, thinking it was just a pillow.

“Ah.”

It was Rachel.

Not a pillow… it was Rachel.

The belated realization struck my brain, and at the same time, my face flushed hot with shame.

I grabbed my head and let out a silent scream.

.

.

.

“It’s the alcohol, the alcohol…”

I fled the bedroom as if escaping.

After a quick wash to clear the remaining sleep from my eyes, I let out a deep sigh.

Water droplets fell from my bangs.

I roughly shook them off, crossing the hallway with stumbling steps.

An unfamiliar tremor paints my chest.

I bit down on my lip tightly, cursing every ounce of alcohol I had consumed last night.

“Well, I just panicked and rushed out…”

Where should I go now?

Rachel’s probably still asleep in the bedroom, so I need to stay somewhere else.

You know, I’m not exactly welcome in this mansion.

“D-d-Young Master…?!”

“Oh, you’re out after so long…? Th-then we’ll be going…!”

Look at those servants.

Just crossing paths and they’re startled, scurrying away.

I clicked my tongue, tasting bitterness.

I forced an awkward smile and looked around, my gaze falling on the grandfather clock in the center of the hallway.

The black hour and minute hands pointed to 9:34, breakfast was long over.

‘…Should I go see Ariel?’

She should be in her room around now.

She must have been worried sick because of me, so it’d be good to show my face.

I set my destination in my mind and moved my legs.

Thump-thump…

My light footsteps echoed clearly through the corridor.

As I floated through the beams of light pouring into the mansion, memories of last night faintly surfaced.

-That’s a butler’s job, young master.

-Your father has always loved you, Raiden.

The whispering voices brought a faint smile to my lips.

Each word was like a warm embrace, melting the frost in my heart.

I quietly clutched my chest.

-Whistle…

A gentle winter wind blew in through the wide-open window.

As if to announce the fact that it was alive, the curtains hanging on the windowsill fluttered.

A pure white dance of drapery.

I stopped walking for a moment and gazed at the outside world, rippling behind the thin fabric.

“……”

Clear shadows repeatedly blocked and then moved out of sight.

The brilliant morning light, hand in hand with the white curtain, performed a lively dance.

The wind brushing my cheek was cool.

Sunlight occasionally flashing across my eyes, warm.

The scenery pulsed like waves.

Faint sensations, stacking up, forming a world.

It felt strange.

Clearly, it was nothing.

I’d only focused on the scene outside the window.

But, just that was enough to make me feel like I was facing an unparalleled ecstasy.

Yes.

For the first time, I was seeing this world as beautiful.

‘This feels… strange…’

My stomach churned.

Like hot dough filling my throat, a suffocating sensation.

I felt like I was going to burst into tears.

My chest, which had been so tightly blocked, suddenly cracked open.

An indescribable sense of liberation washes over me.

A refreshing coolness, and a slight emptiness, filling every vacant space inside me completely.

My pounding heart shakes my ears.

My eyes stung and a single tear streamed down my cheek.

-Don’t hurt anymore, Raiden.

The boys’ voices echo.

Kim Naru, and Raiden.

We who lived through such horribly painful times, comfort each other.

-You suffered so much, so now, a better tomorrow will come.

-Life is like a fever rash.

-Happiness will overflow your future path. We promise you.

The tears showed no sign of stopping.

Maybe the thin tears that I had frozen away in the cruel winter, all melted away by a fleeting spring.

This was freshness.

The freshness of life, stubbornly sprouting even in the rough dirt.

– No one is born to be unhappy.

There is no one in this world born to be unhappy.

It’s just that everyone’s time to bloom into happiness is different, so they hold within them the growth of pain.

Blooming will come, someday.

Me too.

You too.

In the unseen tomorrow, we were certain to be happy.

– Believe it.

– Believe in your tomorrow.

There are people who find salvation simply by believing in the word happiness.

That was me.

Me, who tossed and turned every night with obsession and loneliness.

Maybe what I needed was just one phrase, “You will definitely be happy.”

“Ugh, hnn…cough…”

Standing before the dazzling winter, I had to vomit out my tears for a long time.

It was the first time in my life I had wept so miserably.

Still.

It didn’t feel bad.

.

.

.

Only after my eyes were swollen and red did I finally leave my spot.

The servants were hovering around with flustered expressions, as if they had heard my cries, and I’ve never felt so ashamed.

I walked quickly down the hallway.

Traces of my sobbing still lingered on my face.

‘Why did I suddenly burst into tears… like I’d gone crazy…’

But still, I didn’t feel bad.

If anything, I felt much more refreshed.

Even my body, consumed by an ever-present fatigue, felt a little lighter.

Thump-thump…

Gathering my clear mind, each step deliberate, I soon found myself at my original destination: Ariel’s room.

‘……Come to think of it, this is almost the first time I’ve seen it since arriving at the mansion.’

There was a slight hesitation, but.

Slowly, I reached out and carefully knocked on the closed door.

-Knock knock…

The knock resonated softly.

After a moment of such nervous anticipation, the pristine white door slowly opened.

“Who is it…?”

A listless question slipped through the crack in the door.

As if she’d been starved for days, there was no life left in the girl’s voice.

‘The reason she’s so down… it’s probably because of me.’

I forced away the bitter taste in my mouth.

Behind me, I put on the best smile I could muster.

“Good morning.”

A shock of red hair peeked out.

I gave Ariel a simple greeting as I stuck my head in.

“Uh…?”

Taken aback by my sudden appearance, Ariel let out a blank response.

Her vacant pupils, which had been empty, now captured my image, gradually widening with surprise.

The girl mumbled in a daze.

“O-Oppa…?”

Her delicate shoulders trembled.

Her clear red eyes wandered aimlessly.

It was as if she was anxious that this whole scene was just a dream.

“Is it really… Oppa…?”

A question laced with longing.

Instead of answering, I raised my index finger and tapped her cheek lightly.

“It’s been a while, my lady.”

The soft skin I touched with my fingertip.

It was a warm, heartening sensation that made me smile involuntarily.

Ariel stood frozen in place for a moment.

Then, eyes brimming with tears, she yanked the door open. And immediately lunged towards me.

“Oppa…!”

“Careful, you’ll fall.”

Ariel hurled herself into my arms.

I calmly caught her and wrapped my arms around her.

Droplets of dew, like early morning tears, fell.

Ariel buried her face in my chest, clutching my clothes tightly.

It was a pitiful gesture.

As I gently patted the girl’s back, fragile sobs struck my heart.

“Hiccup, ugh… Oppa… O, ppa…”

“Yeah, it’s oppa.”

“I, I, went, every, day… I was worried about, oppa, so I went, but you wouldn’t, open, the door… sob…”

It seemed the past fortnight had been hard on her.

Dark circles were deeply etched under Ariel’s eyes.

I brushed away the visible marks of her pain, managing a bitter smile.

“I’m sorry.”

“I was scared… hiccup, that oppa, like before… would, disappear, again, that’s why….”

“……Ariel.”

“Please, oppa… don’t disappear. I’ll be better, I won’t be a brat, I’ll be a good sister…”

Ariel wasn’t in her right state of mind.

The sight of the girl trembling with extreme anxiety was a sharp dagger piercing my lungs.

‘I hurt you again.’

I thought the foolish mistakes of the past were enough.

But I always mess things up.

“I’m sorry, Ariel.”

“Oppa…”

My mouth kept repeating apologies.

Ariel cried for a long time after that, and I silently stayed by her side.