Chapter 31 – Lydia

“I must be crazy… !”

What the hell have I done… !

No matter how much I would have known no one except Lydia, I had done something that went against my convictions.

To be honest, I wanted to jump off right now when everything was over.

It’s not even a tall building, so jumping down doesn’t mean you’ll die, but that’s how it feels.

That’s why I feel like I want to die right now… !

I looked around.

There, Lydia was asleep with nothing on, only her face exposed. When she saw Lydia’s sleeping face, she remembered the events of the previous day vividly, and the heat came back to her face.

First of all, the atmosphere was like that, so she was originally going to use her as a nude model in order to draw a better picture of Lydia after looking at her body, so the picture must have been drawn well.

Could it be that he didn’t even draw a picture?

“This is what I drew… “

Fortunately, it wasn’t that I didn’t paint at all.

However, given the circumstances at that time, I wonder if the picture that should have been drawn carefully and accurately was crooked a lot.

It’s not that it doesn’t help, but it wasn’t to this extent.

“Ha… “

It’s a big deal.

The picture I drew while holding back somehow to show it to Lydia was a picture that could be evaluated as good enough, even if it wasn’t as good as usual.

Of course, if you look at it from an objective point of view, it is so, but from my point of view, it should be said that it is a long way away.

“Ugh… “

Above all, yesterday’s work.

When she thinks of Lydia and her all-night flirtation, she blushes and doesn’t feel normal. No matter how you look at it, isn’t it like garbage among garbage that is no different from seducing an innocent woman who doesn’t know anything and throwing it away?

Of course, it wasn’t that I took or did her virginity.

Still, for Lydia, it was no different from her first act. Originally, she was also supposed to meet the right man, get married, give birth to her child, and live well.

I thought I’d rather this be dismissed as a mistake in the middle of the day and go on as usual. Of course, it was definitely my fault for drawing Lydia as a subject matter, and it wasn’t a lie to say that I wanted to see her body and use it in my painting.

But more than that, it was because she felt sorry for her.

“Um… Ah… “

As I was thinking about what to do, Lydia looked up at me with her blank eyes.

It seemed that he hadn’t woken up yet.

“Saint… Sir… Good morning… “

At times like this, she looked like a child.

Obviously, when I see him normally, he is taller and older than me, but it was amazing.

“Yes… Did you have a good sleep?”

“Yes… “

It took a moment for Lydia to get herself up and rub her eyes, as if she noticed that she was not wearing anything.

“Uh, yesterday… “

“Somehow… That’s how it happened ahaha… “

“That, is that an act between women… ?”

Ah… I noticed that too.

What did I say then… I think he clung to me saying that he would teach me something for self-comfort, so I touched him as much as I wanted.

In the end, after doing everything I wanted to do, I felt satisfied and fell asleep. Lydia trembled as she bent over her face and her reddened ears as if her memories of that time were starting to come to her mind.

And…

I wasn’t even wearing anything.

You might be thinking what it has to do with not wearing same-sex clothes, but this is…

Should I say that it is completely different from taking off your clothes and looking at each other after doing all the acts and the feeling of taking them off when you go to wash somewhere?

Either way, it’s something to be ashamed of.

Right now I’m too shy to make eye contact with Lydia.

“Hey, let’s start with clothes… ?”

The futon is also a mess.

Shouldn’t we be able to talk properly once we put all these things away and put on clothes?

Lydia, embarrassed by my words, quietly nodded her head.

“Ah… I should go in to wash before that.”

After doing that yesterday, I wouldn’t have to wash it.

“Let’s go… ?”

“Yes, yes… “

Mmm.

It’s already becoming unbearable.

No, I have to put up with it for now.

I grumbled at this.

.
.
.

I couldn’t stand it in the end.

I don’t want to mention what happened.

“… “

“… “

Lydia was dressed as a nun, and I was dressed as a saint. I sat down and remained silent. Now that I think about it, I have no choice but to know what the hell I did, and it was true that I was very scared.

What worries me most is that Lydia might be disappointed in me.

The saintess I had seen so far was a perfect and faithful person, but she turned out to be a pervert. I mean, it feels the same way.

Of course, Lydia knows something about my nature, so she won’t fall for that idea, but she was pampered and raised, and she has her own sister. What if you feel the same way?

What if her younger sister is no one else and she is a saint who is evaluated in real time as the cleanest in the world?

It’s no wonder that the family is registered on the spot the moment her grandfather finds out.

No, it is not strange that she is kicked out of her position as a saint, not from her family register.

I looked at Lydia in a cold sweat.

For once, Lydia didn’t seem to be blaming me right away.

I don’t know what to say, but she seems to have enjoyed Lydia too… More than anything, if she felt bad about it, she would say yesterday, as well as when she went to wash up earlier, if she rejected me, she would be fine, but Lydia accepted me instead.

How can I do this?

Ah.

Hmm.

As it is, she can’t continue to remain silent.

I called Lydia’s name carefully, trembling her hand holding her teacup.

“That… This is a secret between the two of us… “

“Oh that… Yes… I have to keep it a secret… “

“… “

What is this atmosphere…

Of course, it wasn’t that much of a frenzy of biting, washing, touching, etc., So it’s not that strange that the atmosphere is like this…

Still, even though I’m in the middle of an important story right now, I want that…

Big hum.

“That is… “

“Saint… !”

“Yes yes?”

Lydia didn’t know how to call my name first, so I almost spilled the teacup without realizing it.

She grabbed her strength, which was barely slipping out, and asked why she was calling.

“That… That is… Therefore… “

Is it hard to say

Lydia stuttered her words for such a long time that she couldn’t keep up with her words.

Lydia, who used to be peaceful and kind enough to hug everyone and was sometimes strict, was gone, leaving only Lydia, who looked like a girl she had just fallen in love with.

Ah.

It was clear that she had a real knack for driving people crazy.

“You have to be clear… “

“No, I will tell you. Therefore… “

Lydia, who seemed to be contemplating whether or not to say this, spoke to me as if she was shouting, closing her eyes.

“Ah, in the future… ! Can you teach me… ?!”

“Yes… ?”

Now, wait a minute.

I was really about to drop this time…

She honestly thought she would be hated.

Even if she wasn’t hated, I thought she would at least be disappointed…

Why?

Lydia said she finally said it, and she put on a relieved expression.

On the one hand, she had the look of an expectant girl.

Her hands are trembling

‘This, this… ‘

Isn’t it no different than if I corrupted a normal person with a lily… ?

“That, and… Because he said that I should look at my body and draw a picture… As long as the saintess is in the position she wants, she can show you anything… “

“… “

Ah.

I can’t stand it any longer.

How can I put up with this?

The one who put up with it was strange.

I got up and went over to Lydia.

Then she grabbed Lydia’s chin and met her eyes with me.

As she sat, she would be forced to look up at me.

I smiled softly.

“What did I tell you to call me?”

“Eh, Eris… Sir… “

“Yes, well done.”

I stroked my hair.

At my gesture, Lydia made a relaxed expression and Betsy laughed.

I don’t even know anymore

Maybe I should work harder on drawing.

If you think about it, I’m a woman now, but wouldn’t it be better to just break my beliefs and suck and suck with a woman than to go out with a man?

Of course, it should be done only in the line where rumors do not spread to others.

Still, this was something I had to do.

Since I drew Lydia as a subject matter, it was only natural that I would draw better if I drew after seeing Lydia’s body.

If this is the case, I will draw a cartoon that is as bad as possible.

And my beliefs were limited to cartoons.

Anyway, yes.