396 – The King and the Warrior (3)

Sometimes people have this misconception: I am showered with love from chaos.

Well, fundamentally speaking, it is true that you are loved. You can also shower your beloved toys with love.

Anyway, apart from being loved by Chaos, I don’t know how to use divine powers.

I told you before that Lize would tell you, but well, it got covered up because of various incidents.

I don’t know if Lize forgot or if she really didn’t have time.

So even if Hector asks for help, I don’t know anything. In the first place, Hector would know more about divine power.

“······You don’t know?”

When I brought up the idea that I couldn’t help, Hector looked bewildered.

I think I know what you mean. Ragnarok was Hector’s symbol and the king’s weapon.

But the weapon was rejecting its owner. To be exact, the power of chaos was rejecting him.

I don’t know why, but I can say this one thing.

“I know that the God of Chaos hates me, but I have no idea why.”

“hmm······”

“Is there really nothing to catch?”

Hector is currently wandering. He is in a state of neither here nor there, unable to decide on a clear path.

You might say, “Isn’t this exactly the kind of personality that Chaos, the god of chaos, likes?” But that’s not true either.

Chaos is a god who literally pursues chaos. He is a god who desires complete unity, not separate entities like water and oil.

Look at me right now. Even though I have demon blood mixed in, isn’t there a clear ‘color’?

The same goes for Karas, who has an ideology similar to Lucky Stalin. Although he is chaos itself, his identity as a monarch is firm.

On the other hand, Hector? He is not sure of his abilities as a king, but he has not yet established his identity. He is like oil and water.

From Chaos’ perspective, he’s not a very good guy. In vulgar terms, he’s a double standard, and if we compare him to an animal, he’s a bat.

‘Well. It’s not been long since the country was founded, so that’s understandable.’

As I said before, there are chieftains, or patriarchs, who are dissatisfied with the current Tatar policy.

As the old man I met a few days ago said, this is a generation that grew up seeing only the light of glory. This is a generation that cannot face the shadows.

It’s a headache for Hector, but he knows it well. As the old saying goes, fists are closer than the law.

But if that happens, we also know that the Tatars will return to the days when they lived as tribals. There will be no dilemma like this.

“Then why······my daughter?”

“huh?”

“You can hold Kara just fine. Did Kara also receive Chaos-sama’s blessing?”

I looked at Kara at that question. Kara also seemed puzzled by that part and crossed her arms in question.

Rather than being blessed by chaos, it would be better to say that she did not reject it. At least Kara found her ‘identity’.

From the time he entered the academy, he was constantly discriminated against as a barbarian, and he rebelled against it fiercely.

But not after they met me. They quietly established their identity while understanding me.

Thanks to this, Kara’s discrimination against savages has been significantly reduced. She is an ordinary, ordinary student.

“Similar.”

“Hmm······ Have I ever been disliked by Chaos-sama?”

“yes.”

“Th-what is that?”

Are you desperately trying to grab onto even a shred of hope? Hector asked urgently at my positive answer.

I blinked at him and then answered curtly. I still remember it.

“I beat you up.”

“··· ···”

“Maybe I looked bad at that time?”

“Ugh······”

Since he had a clear criminal record(?), Hector didn’t make any excuses. No, he couldn’t do it.

Of course, even then, Chaos would have felt sorry for Hector. After all, Chaos was the one who approached the wandering one.

Even now, it is more like a ‘test’. If Hector establishes his identity, he will be able to hold Ragnarok with confidence.

“Haa······ So in the end, there is no other way.”

“there is.”

“There is?”

“huh.”

“Didn’t you say earlier that you couldn’t help me?”

It’s difficult to help directly, but it’s possible to help indirectly.

I stared at Hector with a questioning look on my face and then quietly opened my mouth.

“Are you worried?”

“Worried? I can’t hear Ragnarok······”

“Not that. About yourself.”

“··· ···”

Hector paused at my words. His face also gradually hardened.

A reaction as if asking how he knew that. The atmosphere became heavy in an instant.

Since ancient times, people have been known to get angry when their true feelings are revealed. But Hector did not do that.

“······Do you know that you are also a believer in Chaos?”

“Lize told me.”

“If it’s Lize… you’re a saint. I met you when I was young. How are you doing these days?”

“You are doing so well.”

“Yeah, I see.”

Hector said that and glanced at Kara.

Kara, who realized the meaning of that gaze, nodded and went outside.

He put his hand on my shoulder as I was leaving. I felt like he trusted me.

“··· ···”

“··· ···”

“······you.”

“huh.”

Hector started to speak informally to her, but it seemed like he didn’t care.

He looked at me for a long time, sighed deeply, and opened his mouth. When we face each other like this, I feel like I’m a counselor.

“Do you know how scary death is?”

“know.”

“I have overcome death so far using the shield of pride and honor. When I go out as a warrior.”

Most warriors are like that. They tend to overcome the fear of death by using the shield of pride and honor.

Or die to protect your country. Or fight for justice against evil.

Some may think that honor and pride are tacky, but they are very important in society.

If soldiers are respected by the people even if they receive little pay, they are willing to give their lives for their country.

However, being a soldier is not a preferred profession because it is the profession that puts you closest to ‘death’.

“I was strong, and countless enemies knelt before me. Back then, death was not something to be feared. It was something I just accepted naturally.”

“me too.”

“But things changed after I lost my wife and ascended to the throne. My wife’s death came to me as a great fear.”

Hector said with an unusually gloomy expression on his face.

“Death is not honorable, it is fleeting.”

“··· ···”

“And it’s irresponsible. Death is something the living must bear.”

Someone once said that death can be an escape.

But if you run away from responsibility, someone else will suffer great sorrow and harm.

Even in religion, death is very difficult to deal with. Even if there is a God, that God does not tell us about the world after death.

“I used strong force to stop the conflict between the tribes. Thanks to that, I was able to establish the Tatars.”

“··· ···”

“Even after ascending to the throne, I tried my best… but it wasn’t easy either.”

Hector told me a rather long story. After realizing the ‘true horror’ of death, nothing became easy.

As a king, he should protect his people, but after being a warrior for a long time, that is also difficult.

Chieftains who express their discontent? I know their feelings very well, so I can’t answer them with certainty, etc.

“I started the war because I didn’t want to shed blood, but I ended up shedding a lot of blood. I really hate the title of King of Destruction.”

“That’s cool.”

“Wow… I used to think so. Until I lost my wife.”

Hector smiled bitterly. Contrary to his appearance, he seemed to be a loving man.

“I have that much blood on my hands, and now you want me to shut my mouth and stop bleeding? Isn’t that ridiculous? Just because you are the king?”

“··· ···”

“I am a warrior. A warrior who knows the value of honor and pride. At the same time, I have seen with my own two eyes the shadows hidden behind them.”

Hector sighed and spoke wearily.

“Can someone like me become a proper king? A warrior who fears death?”

“It’s all bullshit..”

“I thought so······ What?”

Hector reacted as harsh words came out of my mouth. His face was dumbfounded.

Honestly, from my perspective, I don’t know whether to be a king or a warrior. I have lived a life far from either.

It’s the same when you’re on Earth. You can listen to Hector’s story, but it’s hard to empathize with him.

The only thing I can sympathize with is that death is scary. I’m also scared that those left behind will be sad.

“Hector.”

“Tell me.”

“You are neither a king nor a warrior.”

There is only one thing needed in times like this.

“It just fell apart.”

It’s a solid fact.

*****

-Squeak

Kara, who had been wandering outside for a while, turned her head at the sound of the door opening.

When I turned my head, a very familiar face came into view. It was a man with a blank expression on his face.

Although he had copper-colored skin instead of the white skin he had before, his facial features were still clear.

“Shivar? Is the story over?”

“huh.”

“There’s no need to go inside, right?”

Shivar nodded. It was a bonus that he needed time to gather his thoughts.

After hearing that, Kara glanced at the office and then walked away again.

“You’re not going to tell me what we talked about, are you?”

“Not now. Hector will tell you everything later.”

“Really? Then let’s go now.”

“where?”

“Where is it?”

Kara chuckled and spoke to Shivar in a somewhat sarcastic tone.

“The weather is hot, so I should go and dive into some cool water. Don’t you think so?”

“hmm······”

“I prepared your clothes, so let’s go quickly.”

“huh.”

Shivar was dragged to Kara without thinking. She looked so affectionate.

People passing by stole glances at them, but did not look at them openly.

After all, it was a well-known fact that Kara was easygoing. This time, they were just closer than usual.

“··· ···”

Meanwhile, Hector, who had been hit with a heavy fact, had a dumbfounded expression for a while.

He opened his mouth slightly and looked up, as if his soul was leaking out.

But even though his expression was blank, his eyes were not dim. Rather, they were clear.

‘Back off······ It exploded······’

I heard those words from none other than Shivar, a man who had been treated as a wild man a year ago.

What can I say? As a human being, I feel like my pride has been completely crushed.

Even in terms of military power, Hector felt like his life was being denied.

But I didn’t feel bad. Maybe it was because I was physically and mentally trampled.

‘······There is a podium.’

Since ancient times, people, or rather wise ‘kings’, tend to think like this when they see someone superior to themselves.

‘Can’t we bring it to Tatar?’

I want to recruit him as a talent. That was the thought in Hector’s head.

I never thought of being a king or a warrior. That’s long gone.

‘Now that I think about it, I know there are a lot of cases like that.’

Hector closed his mouth and stood up.

Then, he started to look through the books that were filling up the office one by one.

‘Neither this nor this. Neither this nor that······ Where is it? Should I find the library?’

An untimely curiosity stimulated him.

Also, he had no idea.

-Wow

The Ragnarok that was placed on the desk vibrated very slightly.