Chapter 202 – The Black Forest

#202.

“Then I’ll go…”
“Huh. Lie. Don’t forget to keep in touch.”
“Is it so. Have a safe trip, both of you.”

It seems that something similar happened in the capital of the empire.
After greeting Eris and Arisha, we left the mansion.

‘Ha.. What the fuck are you going to do?’

When I saw Hisha walking next to me, my heart was just fluttering.
Even after hearing the shocking words from Karut a week ago, it still doesn’t quite feel right.
I had to come up with something, but I couldn’t think of anything.

─Really? Hisha is leaving me?
─Yes. She’s not saying she doesn’t love her master anymore. It’s just… I think she’s very tired.
─But… Isn’t it dangerous? You will be pursued by the Church of Destruction!
─ Of course, she’s not completely leaving. But probably won’t stay in this mansion…

How much pain did I have to go through on my own to make such a decision?
It’s all the more shocking because what Karut says, who shares her feelings with Hisha.
Karut once said that Hisha would never leave me.
She even said that if she was abandoned, she would rather commit suicide, but I don’t know why it ended up like this.

I need something… A sharp number.
It was pathetic to do this to the subject who had been teasing her lower body while meeting other lovers until now, but when she thought that Hisha would disappear from my side, the fact caused her unbearably great pain.
Now, she never imagined life without Hisha.

I was dreaming of a future where I could get stronger and erase the perishing church from the world and live happily with everyone, but there is no lightning in the dry sky.

“Lie? What are you thinking about?”
“Uh..? Oh, I’m sorry… Come on, hug me.”
“Huh. Thank you.”

Hisha didn’t know anything and calmly took her into my arms.
Right now, this embrace is filled with such warm warmth.
Still this beautiful woman smiles by my side and that means she’s gone forever.
It made me wonder if I was dreaming at the time.

Tadat-!

I continued to run in stealth, thinking what to do.
I thought about asking directly, but in the end I couldn’t get my mouth to come out.
I didn’t know how I would act if I did and I got the inevitable answer.

I got out of the central part of the continent and entered the southern part where the sun gradually warmed up.
Gradually, the traces of civilization disappeared, and when one set foot in the undiscovered wilderness.
The thick trees gradually grew in size, and various ecology appeared.

“Lie. It’s lunchtime now, so let’s go eat.”
“Uh? Ah, yes..”

Suddenly, when I came to my senses at Hisha’s words, it was time for the sun to rise in the middle of the sky.
After looking around for a while, we got off at an empty lot formed around a rock and started a simple meal.

I could feel his gaze as I ate the beef jerky and drank some water to quench my hunger.
Hisha opens her mouth with her face full of determination.

“Lie. When this is over, I have something to tell you.”
“Okay?”
“Huh. It’s a decision I made after contemplating on my own.”
“…Okay.”

After that, we closed our mouths again.
After a while, after finishing the meal, Hisha stood up straight away.

“Let’s hurry up! The Black Forest is located southeast of here.”

Do you want to break up with me so quickly?
When I said hurry up, I thought of that for no reason, and I felt a surge of emotion.
But this is just my qualifications. He suppressed it, repeating that he really did not mean Hisha.

My body is so close, but as time goes by, my heart sinks coldly.
Cold. The relationship between us was cooling to the point where I could have such an illusion.
Hisha probably feels it too.
Unless you don’t know anything about Karut, you’re probably thinking I’ve heard something.
Still, I have work to do right now, so I’m just holding back.

‘Is it right to stay still like this?’

Is resurrecting Karut and sending Hisha the ending I want?
No, is it possible to resurrect Karut with this state of mind in the first place?
The place we are going to now is a limb that does not know when it will lose its life.
They might face a 10-star Lizardman Lord, but in this case, both of them would just die.

It doesn’t matter how many times I die, but it’s not Hisha.
It may be causing discord by raising the issue to the surface for no reason, but that is better.
It would be better for me to be paralyzed than to go into such an asshole and lose Hisha.

Widely..

Naturally, my feet stopped.
Stepping on the branches of large trees and crossing the forest, I came down to a clearing just in sight.
When I put down the hisha, he looked at me with a puzzled face.
Then, as if he had suddenly realized, he shook his eyes and was agitated.

“Hisha… I heard you.”
“Yeah, I heard you.”
“Why… Are you trying to leave me?”

I desperately suppressed my voice because I thought it would raise my voice.
Then, as if Hisha had regained her composure, she firmly fixed her shaking eyes and spoke calmly.

“I am not leaving. It’s just taking a moment.”
“That’s it!!”

Eventually, I raised my voice.
All sorts of emotions ran through it.
I even thought like an idiot that I might have already met another man, so my heart ran wild like a foal in heat.
However, that feeling also sank to the bottom at the words that followed.

“Are you okay. It won’t be any different than before.”
“What does that mean?”
“I will still be in the capital. We just live apart.”
“Then why is there nothing else?”

No. Don’t open your mouth
Instinct warned.
What Hisha will say now will hurt me greatly.
I need to stop talking right now.
It sounded like that, but I rejected my instincts, thinking that I couldn’t relieve this resentment by doing so.

“It’s the same as now. Sometimes, if you have a sexual desire, you can come to me. I’ll relieve you. Is there any difference then?”
“What is that…”
“Is there anything else. You just need to come and make love with me sometimes and leave. Then it’s over. Same.”

End? Sometimes, whenever I’m in trouble, I go to the store and just pack my semen and go?
I wanted to vehemently protest that it made sense, but I accepted it from the bottom of my heart.
Because that’s what I’ve been doing so far.
How did Hisha feel when she saw me visit every few months to have a relationship and move on to another woman?

She lowered her head, unable to meet her eyes.
Her body twitched and the strength tried to drain from her legs.
The mere fact that I was now in Hisha’s eyes felt like a sin.

“Sorry.”
“Lie. Are you okay. There will be no change in our relationship.”
“I hate that! I… Don’t like that.”

We are not just in a physical relationship.
I thought I loved you deeply and shared many things, but that was just my self-righteousness.
She didn’t even wonder what Hisha really wanted, let alone worried about.

“Hisha. What would you like me to do?”
“…”

Pathetic. Even when I was whipped as a child, tears that did not flow flowed.
Because I made a decision. Being with someone like me doesn’t help Hisha.

“What would you do if I told you to give up on me?”
“I can’t give up. So… I’ll pretend to give up.”
“Okay?”
“Huh. Instead… Not until this is over.”

The resurrection of Karut is not just for me.
In order to confront the Church of Destruction, it was necessary for everyone’s safety.
Also, it was an essential procedure to make Hisha leave her lingering feelings.

Sigh-

Hisha reached out and stole my tears.
Looking at her wet fingers, Hisha narrowed her eyes and stuck out her tongue to lick them.
A smile spreads across your lips.

“It’s good.”
“Hee..Sha?”
“I am strange. Seeing you crying, Rai… Makes me feel weird.”
“…”

‘Come on..?’

Something has changed the mood.
As if it was the last time, as if it would leave at any moment, the air that had settled down became lighter.
Hisha gently stroked my cheek, then pounded her forehead on my chest.

“I can’t either…”
“Hisha…?”

Suddenly, Liza Hisha, confusedly chanting at her inverted emotions, raised her head.
He carefully looked at each of my features and whispered softly.

“I wanted to leave. I thought that would make it easier. I thought you would treat me with more respect.”
“…”
“But… It wasn’t. Rai, because you said you were giving up on me… My heart hurts so much. I hate breaking up. Are you too selfish?”

Hisha hugged my waist tightly and clung closer.
I also hugged her tightly with the will to never let go.

“No. I was too… Comfortable. Your sister is right I was just coveting the body. Sorry.”
“Ugh… It’s okay. Now it’s really… It’s okay. Still, talking about it made me feel relieved.”

We started a long talk.
What do you want me to do, and what do you not want me to do?
At some point, the conversation was cut off while reciting what they wanted from each other.
But it wasn’t the uncomfortable silence like before.
I feel like we’re heading in the right direction.

After all the emotions had subsided, shame set in.
It’s not that you shouldn’t cry because you’re a man, but it was embarrassing to say that you were kicked badly.
I hugged Hisha and patted her, then I pushed her away and turned her head away.

“Now let’s go quickly. Quite a bit of time has already passed. We should arrive before sunset.”
“Pu-huh! What. Are you ashamed of your luck?”
“No. It’s because we have to hurry.”
“Lie.”

Hisha cocks my cheeks with her fingers! I took a picture and smiled.
I am glad that it seems that a lot of the lumps that have accumulated in me have been resolved.
It could have been a bad thing, but I think it turned out well.
Thanks to that, I was able to know a little bit about how to treat my lovers in the future.

‘I should cut down on sex.’

Even if I don’t think so, it may be different for lovers.
If you don’t talk, people won’t know.
They make the mistake of thinking that they know each other, but they cannot truly communicate.
Based on the lessons learned this time, I plan to pay more attention to everyone in the future.

“Lie. Let’s go!”
“Hold tight!”

I hugged Hisha and kicked the ground thinking about how to treat everyone when I go back.
The sunlight filtering through the leaves felt somehow pleasant.

***

“Is he there?”
“Yeah.. It’s been a while.”

After passing through the forest for several hours, as the sun slowly set, we were faced with a completely black forest.
The forest, which gave off an ominous energy, was both familiar and unfamiliar.

‘It’s the same as what I experienced at the academy..’

It was a similar energy to the time Kud Vice connected the demon world and the middle world.
The dark energy that stimulates human negative emotions was sticky and heavy.

“It’s a little too much to go now.. Let’s sleep in the neighborhood today and go back tomorrow morning.”
“Huh. OK.”

As soon as opinions were gathered, we started searching around, and after finding a suitable cave, we ate and slept.
They hugged Hisha tightly and shared each other’s body temperature before falling asleep.
It was a pleasant night.