Chapter 2 – Prologue

Maybe it’s because of the incident.
It was June, when I was 17 years old, in the early summer of my first year in high school.
I have been very big since I was born.
It was to the point of saying that her mother almost passed away while giving birth to me.
Even now, he is 188 cm tall and weighs 90 kg and has a very strong physique.
At that time, when I was 17 years old, I was already over 180 cm tall.
I just went up to high school and the height I measured during my first physical examination was 181cm, and now, at 188cm, I am the height of my sophomore year of high school.
Maybe it’s because I’m big, my stuff is really cut compared to my peers.
I remember going to the bathroom with my father during winter vacation before going up to the second year of middle school, and when he saw my things that were bigger than my father’s, he laughed dejectedly, saying, “That guy’s stuff is useless.”
Her libido is also very strong, so it seems that she has been masturbating since the 5th grade.

When I was 13, a 6th grader in elementary school, my father’s business went bankrupt and our family had to run away at night.
My father asked the driver of a big truck that carries rice to Seoul to do a little housekeeping, and we took only our books, divided them into two trucks, and drove to Seoul.
An acquaintance of my father introduced me to it, so I ended up living in a rooftop room in a 5-story commercial building in 00-dong.
There was a church on the left side of the 4th floor, and a daycare center run by the church on the right side.
There was a storage room on the left side after going up the stairs to the roof, and there was a room that had been newly papered, floored, and had a briquette boiler installed so that the church could use it for meetings.
We were given one room for free on the condition that we clean the church, clean the bathroom, and do the church cafeteria work.
When I opened the door and went out, there was a small stove, and on the other side there was a door leading to the roof.
Since it was not originally a house, I made a wall with panels around the stove and remodeled it like a kitchen, and installed an oil stove, cupboard, and a large water bowl.
There was no faucet because the kitchen was made obliquely, so I had to draw water from the bathroom on the 4th floor with a pail to use it.
Since I was 13 years old, I have been in charge of fetching the water.
I lived in a very poor environment where I had to lock the door of the public bathroom on the 4th floor at night when no one was there after the daycare center was over.

My father took us there and went out to the construction site every day.
Since I was working on construction sites while traveling to the provinces, I could only come home two or three times a month.
From then on, my mother became a villain.
Every day, he would be called to the place where the church people were working, and he would do housework and help with the banquet housework.
In that way, they would receive 10,000 won or 20,000 won, or get something to eat, such as kimchi or side dishes.
He had three young children, so he couldn’t go to factories or restaurants, so he went to work at someone else’s house during the daytime.
Her mother, who used to work at a wig factory when she was a girl when there was no housework, took wigs and cut them at her house.
She never thought of dressing up like buying clothes or putting on makeup.
There were many factories in that neighborhood, and I gave a few 1,000 won pieces to the women who worked at the clothing factory and bought a few of the cheapest clothes, such as Vietnamese skirts, and wore them.
My really beautiful mother did her hard work for her children like that.

That summer she turned 17…
Dad didn’t come today.
My mother must have been tired from wearing her wig until late, so she left her bedside lamp on and slept next to me.
The order of sleeping in our room, which is a single room, was from the door side when the father was there, father, mother, second sister, youngest brother, and me.
It must have been because the man seemed to be reassured by guarding the entrance.
After sleeping for a while, I woke up from the light of the nightstand.
It was a hot night as summer was just beginning.
The door was open, the window was open, but it was hot.
I sat up and looked to see her mother sleeping.
However, the fluttering Vietnamese skirt was on top of her thighs, to the point where her panties were barely visible.
It was probably hot, so my mother took off and went to sleep.
I had a strong sexual desire for a long time, then I thoughtlessly lifted up her mother’s skirt.
White cotton shorts caught my eye.
But I saw that her mother’s buttock was bulging.
Her thighs were sticking out so that the panties could be pulled tight over her tucked-in belly.
Unknowingly, my eyes widened.
My mother’s protruding bumps were all about to catch my attention.
I suddenly felt a burning sensation in my throat.
I felt the same thirst I had felt a few days ago when I saw a naked picture of a woman her classmate had brought to me as an awesome picture.
In the late 1980s, there were not many opportunities to access erotic information because there was no Internet like it is now.
It was a time when the novel Don Juan was printed with a strange title, printed very messy on yellow paper like gangji, and sold secretly in places like Cheonggyecheon.
Still, it was a time when I had to fawn all over my friend to read it once, and read it reverently several times with a heart pounding all over.
As I imagined the inside of her mother’s panties, maybe because of that silly picture, I felt a desire to touch her mother’s buttock.
She lowered her skirt carefully over her stomach and turned her body into a sitting position on her knees.
Leaning forward, she looked down at her mother’s face.
She looked so pretty in the light of the stand as she was sleeping, probably tired.
She lifted her head and took one look in the direction where her brothers were sleeping.
The younger siblings were asleep without knowing the world.

I felt strange for some reason.
The light from the stand was strangely illuminating only my mother and my surroundings.
It was as if I had become the main character of the night, and it was as if a stage was unfolding for me under the light of this stand.
I was enveloped in an atmosphere where I felt like I could do anything.
As she lowered her head, her mother’s full breasts caught her eye.
I tried to hold her mother’s left breast quietly, but she was not wearing a bra because it was hot.
It was so nice to feel her soft breasts.
After kneading it a few times, I looked at her mother’s face once again.
My mother’s lips caught my eye.
So I lifted her up and kissed her mother lightly on the lips.
I love, love, my very pretty mother…
One kiss made me feel better.
And, the atmosphere was enjoyable.
I got up again and this time I rubbed my mother’s right breast a few times.
He was tired and didn’t respond.
But apart from this pleasant atmosphere, my stuff was already swollen like it was about to explode.
With one hand he carefully kneaded her mother’s breasts, and with the other he began to knead the stuff in her panties, which was starting to explode and start to feel a little painful.
After kneading and feeling her mother’s soft breasts for a while, she slowly brought her hand to her mother’s panties.
I swallowed my saliva in my throat, and my hand, which was shaking weakly, covered everything from my mother’s head to the hole entrance with my palm at once.
It felt like it fit right in the palm of my hand.
I put a little strength in my hand and squeezed it lightly.
I felt my fingers go in slightly.
The feeling of the plump and soft flesh in the palm of my hand was so ecstatic.
My object started to get more and more angry, and I had no choice but to keep rubbing it with my hands because it felt like it would break.

I was usually a bit timid.
I was the kind of person who couldn’t even speak loudly to others, always apologized first, and looked out for fear that others would say something.
But on that day, perhaps because of the mood, he didn’t hesitate at all to touch her mother’s breasts and genitals.
I squeezed and opened her mother’s pubic and vagina with force several times, then moved to her mother’s breast and rubbed her breasts.
Then went back down and massaged her mother’s buttock and pussy.
After touching it alternately for a long time, it was time to touch her mother’s pubic area and pubic area.
It was sudden, so I felt a sense of ejaculation from the object.
My hand touching my mother’s vagina entered hard.
Then the fingers that had been holding her mother’s pubic and pubic area went in a little more.
It was both exciting and fun.
But the excitement was greater.
I couldn’t stand it in the end, and I ejaculated into my panties.
It was an overwhelming feeling of pleasure that I had never felt before.
The semen seemed to come out at the end, and the panties were completely damp, making them wet.
In the afterglow of the climax, I leaned forward and trembled, then looked up as I breathed in the breath I had been holding back.
By the way, isn’t my mother looking at me with her head lifted and her mouth pursed?
I was startled when I saw my mother’s face as she opened her eyes.
My mother, who had her cold eyes, was looking alternately between my eyes and her genitals.
I thought her heart would shrink when she saw her mother’s eyes.
I was so embarrassed and scared.
I couldn’t even put on my shoes, so I ran and ran to the bathroom on the 4th floor.
Even though I hid in the bathroom for a long time, I didn’t hear my mother looking for me.
So, after washing my hands, I climbed back up carefully.
I couldn’t get into the room, so I went out to the roof.
I lay down on the roof top and looked up at the sky.
But strangely, I didn’t feel guilty.
I just thought it was good.
However, I thought, ‘How will I see her mother’s face starting tomorrow?’

I must have fallen asleep
Someone shook me up to wake me up, so I looked and it was my mother.
I jumped up in surprise, unable to look at her mother properly, only rolling her eyes around.
“Hurry up, eat, and go to school.”
Mother said bluntly, then she went inside without saying anything else.
I thought I was going to get scolded, but when my mother didn’t say anything, I started to get anxious.
I couldn’t even say ‘I’m sorry’ to my mother, I ate in silence and went to school.

From then on, my wandering began.
Being timid, I never thought to touch her mother again, and I got caught doing strange things like looking under the women’s bathroom, getting beaten up by her father… I think I spent my school days quietly.
But I’ve been estranged from her mother since those days.
From a certain point on, she stopped going next to her mother, evasive answers to her mother’s questions, and went home late because she didn’t want to run into her mother.
Even so, my mother was always extremely sincere for me.
However, I seem to be more and more distant from my mother.

Clearly, the mother must have been okay with what had happened that night.
It wouldn’t be a big deal for my big son who had just entered puberty to touch his genital area, but he probably didn’t have to be particularly nervous.
Besides, it would have been better for the oldest son he loved the most in the world to show such interest in his mother.
Now that I think about it, my mother would have shown it to me even if I had asked for it.
But, I wasn’t like that.
It would have been fine if my mother had said at least a word to her about it, but she feared that I would be awkward, so she just calmly moved on.
It must have been the actions of my mother who was considerate of me.
However, as a young 17-year-old at the time, I thought it was because I was offended by my mother’s bluntness, and I felt more guilty.
So, she became more and more difficult with her mother, and ended up avoiding her mother from some point.
So, now that she is over 40, her mother has become an awkward existence, and she has forgotten her mother’s heart and lives.

I suddenly remembered the day my mother came to her prison for her first visit.
When he saw me coming in wearing a prison uniform, he hit the glass wall and said, “Oh, my son. What should I do? My baby.” While doing so, she remembered how she was weeping loudly.

As I still wiped the tears from my face, watching my mother caressing her cheek, the impossible thought, ‘If only I could go back, I would be better for her mother’.
I was so sorry.
So I shed more tears.
However, my mother was still stroking my cheeks and saying, “It’s okay.”
I staggered and got up slowly.
“Why wake up? Where are you going?”
Asked my mother, following her quickly on my arm.
“No. I’m frustrated, so I’ll just get some fresh air and come back.”
I came out the door again.
My mother was behind her, looking anxiously at me with her weeping face, ready to follow her.
I turned away from my mother and came out and looked up at her sky and took out a cigarette from her.
He lit it, took a sip, and exhaled slowly, trudging along.
In my head, I kept thinking, ‘If only I could go back to my childhood…’.
After walking for a while, I came to the front of the long stairs going down to the main road.
Standing at the end of the stairs, I looked up at the sky again and took a sip of a cigarette.
Suddenly, my eyes flashed, and my head began to spin and my body leaned forward.
‘Uh? Uh? Why is he like this?’
I started rolling down the top of the stairs.