312 – Between Love and Love – 1

We arrived at Elpyris, a city near the elven forest.

You could definitely feel that the exchange between humans and wild elves had increased; there were quite a few more elf-friendly structures than before. Like, a specialty lingerie store for wild elves.

There was even a road with trees planted all along it, giving it an elf-only-road vibe. I watched for a moment, and then *shashashak* an elf zipped past through the leaves.

Judging by the tactical mercenary garb, it didn’t seem like a wild elf, but it seems that even the originally socialized-elves often use the dedicated road.

Selvier spoke, as if struck by a sudden thought.

“…Won’t there be traffic accidents? If they’re going back and forth, won’t they bump into each other?”

“Thinking about it, the road is a bit narrow. If they had planted four trees wide, it’d be a four-lane road.”

But if it was expanded that much, there wouldn’t be enough road for people and carriages. Even now, with the sudden appearance of the elf-only-road, the original road had become narrower, and the fat carriages had to carefully drive their horses to avoid getting scratched.

The merchants’ expressions, full of annoyance, were quite something. The conflict between humans and elves might ignite from the traffic.

“Are you going to solve it?”

“What do you take me for? I’m not the kind of guy who likes to volunteer to solve conflicts between races. But, if I set the stage right, something might happen…?”

If they’re in a relationship where they need each other, they’ll learn to get along, even with some inconvenience. Just point out that part, shave off the unnecessary emotional baggage, and a wildfire won’t break out.

As Selvier and I trudged towards our meeting place, the scent of grilled meat wafted from a nearby stall, tickling my nose.

I’d only had a pseudo-scrambled egg this morning that Yuna had tried (and failed) to make, so I was feeling a bit peckish. The smell of grilling meat on an empty stomach was hard to resist.

“Oh, that chicken skewer looks tasty.”

“I wonder if it’s really chicken.”

“The sign says chicken skewer…but it could be rat, or pigeon, or some other beast. But, I don’t care.”

The point is, as long as it doesn’t make you sick, right?

“There’s a divine spell called ‘Purify Contamination,’ right? If I use that, it won’t matter what the raw material is, it won’t make you sick.”

“⋯⋯So, you’re gonna buy some chicken skewers, go to the temple, and ask the priest to purify them? Isn’t that a bit extravagant? I heard the temple fees got cheaper when the Bennet family took over, but it’s still a bit much to use on skewers.”

“It’s fine. You can use the divine power, not me.”

“Huh?”

The Goddess’s system, a tangled mess of spaghetti code thanks to the corrupted former cardinals, was slowly improving through the efforts of me, the young Pope, Niore, and Hero-Ping.

The first thing we tackled was the “No Unlicensed Divine Power Usage” clause. We were trying to overhaul the system where anyone with faith, regardless of corruption, could just tap into divine power.

We nearly cracked our skulls trying to unravel that triple-layered knot.

And we succeeded. Word is the former cardinals had their divine power immediately cut off, and now they’re just doing some behind-the-scenes PR, keeping their heads down.

“But… it’s still imperfect. So, if you know a certain backdoor, you can still tap into divine power.”

“⋯⋯You’ll get punished by the gods!”

“The Goddess likes rules, my dear. So, she’ll forgive a little exploitation. All you have to do is rub your back against the corner of a building and recite page 132 of the scriptures. Wanna give it a try?”

“I’d rather just get a stomach ache. You have no fear, seriously.”

*Thwack.* Selvier’s hand landed hard on my shoulder. She’s wearing full Mage Tower robes, but it still stings. Her base attack power is pretty high.

“Two skewers, please.”

“Yup, coming right up, fresh off the grill.”

A short wait later, we got two slightly undercooked skewers. The outside looked nicely browned, but by my calculations, the inside wouldn’t be evenly cooked. “Fresh off the grill,” he said, but not well-cooked, I guess.

Just as Selvier was about to take a bite, I stuck my finger in her mouth.

*Nom.*

Selvier immediately glared.

“⋯⋯What was that?”

“It’s undercooked. Needs some more cooking. Can you fire this up a bit?”

“Like a gas range, swallowing people whole…”

Still, she must not have wanted to eat anything undercooked. She sparked a fire on her left hand and took her skewer of Selbire, cooking it a little more. This was it.

Selbire blew on the steaming skewer before glancing at me out of the corner of her eye.

“O, open your mouth. aaah.”

“Wouldn’t that attack be more effective if you took the first bite, Selbire? Then I could receive the indirect-kiss buff and hit even harder.”

“…Don’t analyze it, don’t lecture me, just… eat it quietly! You’re just trying to embarrass me, aren’t you?! Right?!”

Bingo.

I obediently took the skewer that Selbire nearly shoved down my throat. It didn’t taste like chicken. It was probably… some kind of minced rat meat shaped into something.

The seasoning on the outside was so strong that it was actually palatable. I quietly recorded the data as I chewed. I could use it in the scene with the street vendor in the session.

“Want me to feed you too?”

“…No, thanks.”

“I can hear the hesitation, Selbire. Wouldn’t it be better to humbly accept it and feel embarrassed, rather than reject it out of pride and regret it later?”

“I said, no!”

Selbire stomped ahead about five steps, then slowed down to adjust her position, two steps in front. She was fun to tease, so sensitive that she’d react with a startled cry at the slightest poke.

It’s the same everywhere, really. Close relationships usually look like this.

Jokes and banter exchanged while maintaining a sense of fun, an understanding of the other person, and the ability to have a good, flowing conversation based on that understanding.

“Ha… Why are there so many lovebirds doing that kind of thing on the streets these days?”

“Jo, grab your weapon. If we want to settle down and have a family later, we gotta do at least one more commission before our spines give out…”

Lamentations from the dateless filled the air. Selbire and I had teamed up to release a wide-area attack that was shaking people’s hearts.

Their grief was understandable, but that didn’t mean we’d stop canoodling.

We weren’t *officially* a couple yet, but I couldn’t help thinking we were probably the cutest pair in the whole damn neighborhood. Lost in that thought, I arrived at the meeting spot.

“Oh, my love, today you are as beautiful as those glittering stars! So radiant, it pains me to even look upon you… Ah, if I continue to meet you, I will surely go blind. What will become of me, a blind man…?”

“If you go blind, I will be your eyes. If you lose an arm, I will be your arm! Even if the Goddess grows jealous of our love and punishes us, I’d gladly fall into hell if it means we can be together!”

“Julietta, my love! I swear to the sun that this burning passion will last forever. In a world without you, I would not want to even take a single breath… H-Hurg, I can’t breathe for lack of your breath….”

“Rumeo, my sun! I will breathe life back into you! You cannot die and leave me in this cold world!”

*Kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss.*

An elf woman and a human dude were putting on a truly nauseating display of affection.

“……..”

“……..”

Selvier and I looked at each other, then quietly edged away. On second thought, excessive PDA in a crowded public place was just plain inconsiderate. We should probably avoid that.

Judging by the situation, that Juliet-whatsername seemed like our client. I leaned against the wall, far away, and just waited for their skit to end.

I learned today that goodbyes can last a full thirty minutes.

It was this drawn-out, “I’m sad because I have to leave you but I have to go because I have an appointment, but it hurts so bad to be without you, whoa whoa whoa,” nonsense, stretched out like noodles.

After thirty minutes of this cringeworthy love fest, which was painful for both onlookers and participants, the human guy finally left, and I could finally approach our client, the elf Juliet-whatsername.

–

“Thinking about it, we’re not nearly as bad as that, right, so we’re fine?”

“…I guess that’s true.”

After a brief moment of distance induced by vicarious shame, Selvier and I closed the gap again. And then we sat across from the elf who sent me the letter, our client.

This place was a medieval fantasy tea room. It was quiet with hardly any customers, so it seemed like a good place to chat.

The elf slurped down the greenish tea-like liquid in front of them, then calmly greeted me.

“Hello, human.”

“……You’re awfully composed compared to before?”

“How can treating a loved one be the same as treating someone who is not? Did you read the letter?”

“Ah, yes.”

I mentally re-organized the situation. This elf is conflicted between their family and their lover. Because the wild elf’s unique emotional bonding is the problem.

If they don’t participate in the emotional bonding ritual, they’re exiled from the elf community. They’re so tightly knit through completely exposing each other’s inner feelings.

But if that emotional bonding gets screwed up, that crazy, huge love infects the entire elf network.

It’s a difficult either/or choice.

The reason these side effects weren’t noticed before is because.

Wild elves lived secluded in the forest amongst themselves and didn’t interact much with other races. That tendency got even worse after they punched a hole in Irid when they came looking for a World Tree sapling.

So, if they fell in love with a human, and that love was greater than their familial affection, they would break their “spiritual bond” from the wild elves and choose to just live as an elf.

It was too difficult to have the best of both worlds when the relationship between humans and wild elves was so rocky.

But now that the wild elf group itself has started interacting with humans, maybe they could achieve love while maintaining their bond.

I think that’s the hope with which they sent me that letter.

It’s a tough problem.

“………..”

I ran a quick simulation in my head, and it felt like a real catastrophe could break out. All the wild elves in a community could start loving one person that intensely.

In the case of the crazy crow, they controlled the intensity of the situation. They spread malicious information with a level of affection akin to idolizing a celebrity, so while the wild elf rangers hesitated to shoot me, they didn’t outright jump me.

But what if that high concentration of love spreads?

Could this be the dawn of an unprecedented elven harem? If that greasy guy I saw earlier even *thought* about wanting an apple, would an entire pack of wild elves rush over to peel one for him?

A random thought surfaced, and I mumbled,

“Harem-pure love… Ugh!”

Selvier pinched my thigh under the table. She clearly didn’t like that word.

To get a bit more intel, I asked the elf directly,

“How much do you love your boyfriend?”

“Ah, Rumeo! I’d give my life for him. I still remember the first time we met. I was being threatened by a group of delinquent humans, and Rumeo appeared and saved me—”

“Okay, no more backstory. But you *are* worried about being separated from your family, right?”

“Being disconnected is like death. We are one, a collective. I can’t even imagine a life apart from us…”

I crossed my arms and tilted my head back, staring at the wooden pattern on the ceiling, counting each detail, one by one. Elven affection is deeper than I thought, and of course, the bond between wild elves is strong, too.

Sharing memories and feelings… That’s the stuff of stories: a “perfect understander.”

They know my inner self directly, understand my feelings perfectly. In a way, their bond is even deeper than what I have with Yuri.

They’re both so precious, I can’t choose either. I don’t know how to handle both. That’s why she sent me that letter.

This is hard. A difficult problem.

The simplest thing, of course, would be giving up on one side. In that case, I need to figure out which choice would benefit the elves more. I started debating with Selvier.

“Purely from a benefit perspective, wouldn’t it be right to give up on the boyfriend?”

“But what about the heartbreak? And if the elves are all connected, wouldn’t the problem just spread? Instead of the affection spreading, wouldn’t it be the heartbreak?”

“That’s true. The entire elven community could become a gloomy pack, clutching pillows and writing ‘let’s meet again’ letters at midnight. So, is eradicating love itself… That’s inhumane. Right?”

“How’s that any different from brainwashing? And even if my feelings aren’t reciprocated by you, brother… Even if it feels like my heart is being ripped apart… I wouldn’t want to erase it. It hurts because it was precious.”

Right. Avoiding emotions isn’t the answer, I learned that from the journey we took. So, the opposite way…

“Give up the elf community? If you do that, you’ll become, like, super unstable. You’ll cling to your loved one as much as the empty space left by your family.”

“But if that empty space can be filled with happiness, isn’t that a happy ending? I gave up my life at the Red Tower to be with you, Oppa, too.”

“Still, think about it. What if the fever of love cools down and you break up… then you lose both your family and your lover. Like someone who went against their parents to build a life only to get divorced, becoming estranged from their family as a result.”

“Then I just go back, right! If our hearts can connect, if we get dumped we can go back to the elf forest to connect… and just become a wild elf again.”

Then the elf community would be filled with a bittersweet feeling of longing for the ex-boyfriend.

The boundary between the individual and the collective is so blurry, it’s a headache. I see why they distinguish between elves and wild elves.

Ah.

“I’ve got it. This is a problem that arises because there’s no filtering. If one emotion goes around in the elf community, everyone gets swept up in it, that’s the issue. So, when individuals upload their emotions to the elf server… what if we reduce it to about 10%?”

“Wouldn’t that mean that the ‘perfect understanding’ won’t be established anymore? Elves will become different from each other, won’t understand each other, and then they’ll fight.”

“Aish, my head…”

Then should I adjust the percentage appropriately? Or should I just pick one? Is the harem-pure-love route the answer?

While I was agonizing over my dilemma, it seemed Selvior wanted to take a break too. She asked the elf across from us,

“Does… that Lumio person also know about this? That the wild elves are connected.”

“Yes, I explained it to Lumio. He said that if he just gets along with my elf family, it shouldn’t be a problem for us to be in love… and that he promised to treat my family well. Isn’t he so caring?”

So, that’s the guy’s mindset. He’s going to keep his love alive, even if he has to suck up to a mass of in-laws who are going to spring up out of nowhere.

“Hmm…?”

As I nodded, somewhat convinced, Selvior tilted her head the other way, making a face like a customer who realized the skewer wasn’t chicken but rat.

“Wait a minute, Oppa, let’s talk.”

Selvior asked for the wild elf’s understanding and got up from her seat, moving to a secluded spot where their voices couldn’t be heard.

And then she openly expressed the nagging feeling she had.

“⋯⋯Isn’t it a little weird?”

“What part?”

“Assuming the elf explained it properly, it’s basically saying an entire elf community could fall in love with him.”

“Yeah, right. So, if he’s a jerk to other elves, it’d mess up their family dynamic and all that… so he’ll take responsibility and look after them, right?”

“That’s the weird part. It’s like he’s saying he’ll accept the advances of the majority who say they like him, for love’s sake.”

Huh?

“Oppa, let’s say I was super close with the Purple Magic Tower Lord. Would that mean you’d unconditionally accept my confession because of that?”

“⋯⋯⋯⋯No, right?”

Saying it like that makes the situation feel incredibly delicate. All sorts of thoughts started swirling. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off.

And so, the love-struck detective Selvier declared, eyes gleaming,

“We need to investigate the guy.”

We began the second investigation.