Chapter 126 – The North (10)

Drinks were exchanged and the night was deep. Strangely enough, the stories that had accumulated in my heart continued to emerge. We, who had mixed lies with the stories we had lived through, listened to the old stories without making eye contact. It was because we couldn’t have an honest conversation because we had changed so much.

“Do you remember number 13?”

It was No. 5 who first brought up the name buried in the past. He looked at the stars and asked me if I remembered number 13. I nodded and smiled. No. 13. Thanks to her striking silver hair, small body, and fairy-like appearance, she was the most loved child in the family.

She was riding in a carriage when I and I were being dragged along like Unit 5 slaves. It was because the wealthy old man took only No. 13 with him in the procession. The cries continued until the carriage door closed. As she moved away, I buried the memory of No. 13 in a dark past.

“I don’t remember. Where have you heard the news? Where did you live as a concubine of a rich family?”

“No.”

No. 5 said that and shook his head. His face was also full of sadness. I said to number 5 with a smile.

“Then why did you suddenly bring up her story? Make me depressed.”

Number 13 was a really nice kid. He was the smartest kid, and the most loved. ‘The ignorant slave’ was never synonymous with good news. It was a word that connoted tragedy enough to be synonymous with words such as “A corpse buried secretly” Or “A skeleton rotting in a gutter.”

No. 5 said while watching me put the glass down.

“Why are you going to see the tanner?”

Laughter came out of nowhere. There was only one reason to ask such a direct question. He laughed for a while and drank again. My belly was boiling hot, then it cooled down as if someone had poured water on it. I said while setting the glass.

“For love and justice.”

I didn’t really believe those words. It was the most famous joke, so it was only used. Love or justice, when I threw these two words out to those who asked why I did anything, people laughed and didn’t ask any more questions.

Number 5 laughed and said:

“That’s an absurd reason.”

No. 5 didn’t seem to be laughing even when he laughed. He was different from when he was a slave, who always had a bright smile. He dreamed while looking at the stars, and at that time when he expected a vague and beautiful future, No. 5 was a man who knew how to smile flawlessly.

Caught in the past, I was still looking at number 5. I bring up old memories that he can’t have of course in the real him, and I’m disappointed on my own. I don’t know how many disappointments I keep in my heart today.

“Yes.”

The moon was still watching us. The multicolored stars gathered around the moon invaded our drinking table and sprinkled their light on the glasses and tables, like a crowd with a premium. Number 5 had a face that wanted to continue this conversation.

But neither I nor No. 5 knew that our conversation was over. It was a common catastrophe when you falsely sought understanding across the precarious line of being a friend you met in the past. I packed my clothes. Number 5 ran her finger across the table and looked at me.

We met each other’s eyes, and I was about to say goodbye.

“Have you ever thought of revenge?”

It was a word from #5 that stopped me. Plural. I was closer to revenge than anyone else. The women by my side were the ones who would share my revenge. My revenge ended after Carlson fell from the second floor, but there were still many people in the world who wanted revenge.

Alexander who demoted Rumia. The Plancians, who tried to marry Isabelle into her Hero family. The hero who demoted Lorena’s father. The thieves’ guild that tried to kill me. My family was bound by revenge. And I couldn’t figure out which of them Number 5 was working for.

“What are you talking about?”

So I denied my roots. He smiled slyly, as if he had never thought of revenge. It was the acting I was most used to during my more than 10 years of slavery. For the slave would die instantly if he showed any grudge against him. Pretending to laugh like an idiot, pretending to be nice to people. The life I’ve lived has ironically been accompanied by laughter.

No. 5 said.

“People always dream of revenge. To the man who brought me down as a slave, to the man who ruined my life. To people who are trying to assassinate you or bring you down. No. 17. I mean. Ever since I got up here, I’ve killed everyone who tried to bring me down. The ‘him’ I work with has also finished his revenge. But still I’m obsessed with revenge. Aren’t you curious? I finished my revenge, but I’m still obsessed with hatred and trying to kill people. That there are still a lot of people to deal with.”

No. 5 said that while looking straight at me. His eyes were shaking. A violent storm raged in his eyes, which had calmly suppressed his emotions. Hearing his words made me reconsider my revenge.

It wasn’t about whether or not to take revenge.

It was a story about what my family and I should do after the revenge is over and after I become a stronger demon. The cruel revenge play does not narrate what follows. It was because it was obvious what kind of life a human being who had burned his emotions and remained only ashes would live.

Ashes will eventually be thrown away. No. 5 finished his revenge, but he still couldn’t get out of the revenge play. There was no way I could know the magnitude of the tragedy that consumed his life.

“It’s a lie to say you never wanted revenge. By the way, the man who was my master died. I don’t even know where to start looking for someone who twisted my life.”

As I said that, I was suddenly able to turn around.

The women I’ve gathered to seek revenge, the people who have pledged to avenge the world with me. We were preparing the greatest revenge in the world. If the hero dies, the saint dies, the great sage dies, the thieves guild perishes, and the Plancia family collapses, what should we do next?

What kind of existence do we have to live in this world? I cleared my confused mind and continued the story.

“You know my story. The corrupt guard captain twisted my life, and the thugs ruined my life. The slave trader beat me up, sold and sold, all the way to Carlson. And I’m living a lot better than those bastards now. To be honest, the desire to find out the news and kill it is like a chimney… I even want to do that. I’m living well now anyway.”

“Have you given up on revenge?”

“I don’t know.”

It was literally.

Revenge and the goal of becoming a stronger demon were intertwined in a confusing way. When you become a stronger demon, what do you do next? After the revenge, the world will be fucked up, and then what should I do?

I couldn’t figure out anything

“There’s a lot to do after revenge. Anyway, Isabel’s ex-husband, who bothered me the most, died miserably. That means I could do something a bit more productive than venting my remaining hatred on others. For love and justice, you can go find a tanner, or you can tell your beloved wife that you love her… #5 I don’t know what happened to you. My position is yes Now that I have a precious person next to me, I shouldn’t be buried only in hatred.”

All I could know was one thing.

Even for the sake of the family next to me, I must never leave a broken world as it is. That someone has to rebuild the collapsed country. In order to do that, you have to let go of hatred the moment you finish your just revenge.

Number 5 took a drink and said:

“Love and justice.”

Number 5 chewed the words like chewing gum and suddenly laughed out loud. He smiled and nodded and said to me:

“It must be something like a hero. Love and justice.”

I laughed.

“Isn’t that a bit out of place? Pillar West is love and justice.”

“You came all the way to the North. To that wife, you must be a warrior.”

I remembered Isabel’s face. His face trembled like a puppy, fearing that he would be eaten by the cruel gay devil of the North. I smiled and nodded.

“Maybe.”

Number 5 nodded and stood up. He held the bag in one hand and pushed the table aside. I was taken aback by the way he seemed to want to go out with me.

“It was fun. No. 17.”

“Where are you going?”

“The plan has changed. Reindeer hunting doesn’t sound like much fun. I plan to go somewhere else in moderation.”

I didn’t know what face to make. He must have been making a funny expression, as if he was laughing or crying. Because No. 5 was smiling and patting my shoulder. We came down to the first floor entrance and faced each other. Number 5 was staring at me with eye contact, and I was avoiding my eyes from the eaves of the inn.

“Evan.”

Number 5 called my name. I felt a little strange to be called by his name. No. 5 did not give me time to respond.

“Since you have someone dear to you, you can find something more important than revenge?”

I nodded. Perhaps. We’re too young to be obsessed with hate. Number 5 kept asking me questions.

“Evan. My owner and I have been together for a really long time since I escaped the facility. I worked with the determination to lay down my life for that person. Evan. Am I a precious person to my master? Can I convince him?”

I couldn’t answer The weight of the question was too heavy for me to answer. No. 5 didn’t seem to expect an answer from me either. He draws conclusions for himself and laughs drunkenly at the conclusion. And he said this.

“Following the ridge of the mountain range, there is a village called Phoebe. From what I’ve heard, a good tanner lives there.”

“What?”

A blizzard raged. White pieces of ice separated the two of us. In the frosty wind, the figure of No. 5 scattered like an illusion. I stood in front of the tavern feeling like I was dreaming, and not even 5’s footprints were left on the snowy field.