Chapter 157 – Senia Reeves #02

This pleasant suffocation makes me happy no matter how many times I get it. Maybe if I die like this, I’ll be a merchant.

But I didn’t come to die by sticking my nose in the teacher’s chest, so I boldly removed my face from his chest to his.

“Ugh~ How can you be so cute! Are you really not thinking of becoming a graduate student?”
“No.. I have more things to do than graduate students, so that would be impossible.”
“I’m sorry.. I would be happy if Artin came. The atmosphere has been bad lately since the rose garden..”

When I refused, Ms. Senia looked sullen and looked like a big dog that had been denied a walk, but I had to firmly refuse.

An alchemy graduate student in a situation where even if you build up to catch the devil right away, it won’t be enough? I’m going to die after 5 years of kneading Mr. Senia.

“Then why don’t you work hard at the alchemy club instead? Huh? Every day just me, Charles and Claire come out to clean!”
“..Okay, I’ll go see you as much as possible from now on. Is that okay then?”
“Yes! Artin is also nice! Please listen to my request!”

The teacher’s joy and sorrow were clearly mixed with every word I said, to the point that anyone would think he was bipolar.

It’s not strange. As much as the ego of the teacher in the unconscious has appeared, that must be the inner thoughts that I have been wanting to tell me so far.

‘..You always wanted to make me a graduate student? That’s kind of creepy.’

However, unlike other professors, he has never directly recommended graduate students to me, so he must have been holding back the thought of wanting to do so.

Why didn’t you recommend it yourself? It is too easy to guess why.

‘…It’s because the teacher has a very kind personality.’

I could tell just by reading the novel that Senia Sensei had a kind personality. However, it was a different feeling for her to actually interact with her kind, beautiful elf teacher of her.

In the first round, when I consulted that I would drop out of school, she didn’t know much about the teacher. In fact, it was a time when people in this world thought they were no different from game NPCs.

But that was an illusion of my arrogance. Although he has a very artificial personality, Senia Sensei was one of the human figures I had never met.

“Teacher, do you have any unknown memories about me or vague feelings for no reason?”
“Yes? What is that? Are you feeling sad? Is Artin like my childhood friend who broke up with me when I was young?!”

No wonder. In the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th rounds, I kept my interactions with the teacher as far as possible, so there’s no way my memories will be engraved.

“Then are you treating me well because you covet my talent?”
“Umm… Teacher, I don’t know what Artin is talking about. Do you covet your talent and do it well?”
“..Do you want to make me a graduate student?”
“No? It can’t be! It’s a bad thing to be nice to someone in return!”

There is not a hint of darkness in the expression of the teacher who answers brightly. There is no hesitation to tell a lie, no double-mindedness.

“Master, that’s…”
“I know even if you don’t say anything. That is unmistakably sincere.”

Even if you don’t read the unconscious with Sirka, you can find out. What Senia-sensei’s subconscious says is the truth.

No, in the first place, all unconsciousness does not answer such questions.

“..Then, does the teacher like me?”
“..Oh?! Did you notice!? Shame on you..! Since when did you know?”

People do not show their important feelings, memories related to weaknesses or memories that they want to hide from others.

That’s why, in order for dream demons to actually break people’s minds, they have to dig into the deepest depths.

However, Senia’s unconscious mind is clear and clean. As if she didn’t know how to be suspicious of others, as if it was natural for her to do good to others.

.. Until now, I was burdened to get close to such a teacher, so she didn’t get close to her until the 4th session.

“Now~ I heard the teacher’s answer, so it’s great! Pure love sex confirmed!”
“…”
“..Master? Why are you so serious?”

Shirka wouldn’t know. No, people I’ve met in this world won’t know. That’s why the emotions I’m feeling right now are rising.

“Are you okay, Artin? Your expression looks really bad…Will the teacher hug you?”
“… Yes, hug me. Please hug me warmly.”

Senia teacher looked at her with a worried expression and invited her, so I opened her arms and hugged her teacher.

Normally, I would have been delighted with the softness of her chest when we hugged.

‘..Teachers are different from those teachers.’

I was trying to overcome her PTSD with the warm warmth of Ms. Senia enveloping her body her.

**

There are people in the world who think they are special and there are people who do the opposite.

A person who thinks he has no value, a mental loser who has a sense of debt just by being alive and has lost his sense of self-esteem and confidence.

The human Yang Hee-min was close to that kind of person.

The sad thing is, it doesn’t come from an innately negative personality, but should I say that the surrounding environment made it that way?

The beginning was no big deal. When I was a child whose memories are fuzzy, I used to quarrel with the children in the orphanage over trivial things.

The problem is that when the other person couldn’t win the argument with Hee-min, he attacked with the best stone.

“Aww! Aaaaang!”
“Oh, my God, Heemin! What the hell have you done?!”

When the teacher from the nursery school came, the boy who had attacked with a stone was crying on her floor with her nose bleeding.

And in Hee-min’s hand her, the stone that the boy had stolen was held in her hand her, and because of that incident, Hee-min was branded as a troublemaker at the orphanage.

It was unfair. He explained that it was a boy who hit him first, and also explained that he had heard the stones.

However, the boy who was on good terms with her classmates lied to her and said that Hee-min attacked her with a stone first.

“There’s no way all kids can lie. I’ve seen teachers too. How long are you going to lie? At least tell the truth to the director!”

Now that I think about it, those words might have been an adult’s compulsion to calmly go over it by quietly blaming herself and showing self-reflection. However, Hee-min, then and now, had the temperament of rebellion.

“… No, I didn’t. Everyone is lying!”

She could not conform to what she was not convinced of. So Hee-Min did not accept her own charges her in the end.

“Look at that, did you know that poor boy fought again? Minsu’s nose bleeds!”
“The other kids get along well with each other… But the director also gave up, so what should I do?”

Eventually, starting with that incident, he fell out with her children, and Hee-min remained a troubled child until he was eventually discharged from the nursery school.

──It was because no one believed Heemin’s words.

It was the same at school.

In a class society of young children, as if it were natural for a child in a childcare center with no parents and no money to be bullied, Hee-min had to face the children’s contemptuous gaze throughout her school days.

“Teacher! It smells like ash!”
“Teacher! Hee-min calls us a fuck!”
“Right! Even when I was playing on the playground earlier, they called me an idiot!”

Heemin had never been like that. It was because Hee-min learned from living in an orphanage that if you don’t behave, you will be criticized by others.

However, it is just a fun game for the children, and Hee-min has settled down as a child in a daycare center who beats, harasses, steals and curses at the children.

The evaluation does not change even after the school year passes. The teachers were suspicious of Hee-min when there was a problem, and she called the nursery school to inform them, and the teachers at the nursery school scolded Hee-min and forced her to lead a proper school life.

“What? Are you dreaming of being a police officer? Why don’t you start by learning not to fight with the kids?”

Heemin’s childhood dream was that she was to become a police officer. Her sixth grade homeroom teacher laughed at it and blamed her for her Hee-min’s behavior.

“Hey, what kind of teacher is your grade, teacher! Are you always going to fight or be a teacher? Done! Go and clean the bathroom as punishment for being late today, okay?”

When I was in middle school, my dream was to become a teacher. Because he wanted to correct the absurdity he had suffered.

However, the homeroom teacher at the time of the second year of middle school who heard the dream wrote that Hee-min’s lively behavior her showed antisocial behavior and that her learning attitude her was poor and violent. The reason is that she has never received a single compliment from Hee-min.

“What? Do you want to go to university? Hey, what university are you from? Do you have money to go to college? Just write that you will get a job after graduating from high school.”

My dream in high school was to go to college. However, the homeroom teacher, who was busy taking care of only the children of well-to-do families, wrote civil servants in Hee-min’s career hopes and ended her personal counseling her in one minute.

Distrust and lethargy naturally began to take root in Hee-min’s mind among the repressed life and school life exposed to violence for about 20 years, and among adults who did not protect themselves.

The helplessness that he will not be recognized no matter what he does.

A sense of distrust that adults in society will not be interested in them.

Those two negative feelings continued even after going out into society, and after being betrayed by the only person he believed to be his friend his, he was convinced of those two negative feelings he had accumulated.

Of course, even after living as Artin in the novel by chance, these feelings naturally continued.

The only thing you can trust is yourself, and it is your essence to live quietly and as if you were dead.

..The fact that it was Artin who happened to be possessed might be because even the author knew him well. Because he thought so.

There were two people who were most important to Artin at the time of the first round.

The first was Xiao-Mei, who followed her throughout the first playthrough and erased the distrust of human beings and the sense of helplessness deeply rooted in their hearts.

“Artin, your expression is dark today. Is there something wrong with you? Is there anything the teacher can do to help?”

And her second was Miss Senia, who erased her distrust of her own teacher.

A kind, bright, and always interested teacher.

Yang Hee-min, the human, had dreamed of doing so, and in the end, she was someone she had never met before.