The Incompetent Minister Wants To Retire

Chapter 29

The Incompetent Minister Wants To Retire

Despite being extremely incompetent, for some reason it’s hard to retire.

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Your Daughter Grew Up Beautiful, Didn’t She?

Chapter 29

“No, no! Please hear me out! I really do need help!”

*It would seem so. Mostly mental.*

“Wounds of the heart don’t heal on their own just by enduring them. You should seek proper counseling. If you’re hesitant to find someone yourself, I can recommend a specialist.”

It was a sincere suggestion, but the self-proclaimed Asero Kerkera, instead of being grateful, jumped up and lashed out.

“That’s because I’m not crazy! And you’re the one who needs to go!”

*Why would I?*

“Then what do you want me to do?”

“Help me!”

“What?”

“…I don’t know.”

I’d sensed it since her first uninvited intrusion, but it seemed I’d been well and truly snared by a lunatic.

The thought that I wouldn’t be sleeping tonight brought on a wave of self-pity, and I was lamenting this when the self-proclaimed Asero Kerké continued, her face looking like she might burst into tears.

“I need help. I can’t do it alone. Yes. I failed when I was alone. I need to gather comrades… wait. Even with comrades, didn’t I still fail…?”

This is bad. I’m starting to get scared.

Feeling like there was no end in sight, I reluctantly decided to offer some help.

“You said you came back to me because we had a shared understanding.”

“Uh-huh.”

“What shared understanding are you talking about?”

“Why, chasing after those guys… Ah! That’s right! Those guys! The Oracle! We have to stop the Oracle, no matter what!”

“Tell me this ‘no matter what,’ and I’ll see what I can do to stop them.”

What exactly are we even supposed to be stopping in the first place?

Stopping them from finding whatever key it is they’re looking for?

Hold on a second.

Could this woman actually know what this key is?

“Do you perhaps know what this key the Oracle is looking for is?”

“…I don’t know. I knew, but I forgot. I’ve never even seen it myself.”

Figures.

“Do you remember anything about why we have to stop them?”

“I do! If we don’t stop the Oracle, the world will be destroyed again!”

“…Again?”

What is this? Has the world already been destroyed once without me knowing?

“What do you mean ‘again’?”

“Umm, I don’t know. I can’t remember…”

This woman is truly useless.

She kept talking like she vaguely knew something, so I tested how much she actually knew, but it seems like it was all for nothing.

“Alright, I understand. I’ll have the Oracle stopped.”

“Really?!”

Strictly speaking, it won’t be me stopping them, but my capable subordinates will, but explaining that would just drag the story out again, so I decided to just leave it at that.

“Then you can go back reassured.”

“Uh, no. I have things I need to do too…”

“Do you even remember what those things are?”

“No.”

Just go back already. Please go back.

Had my fervent wish been heard? The self-proclaimed Asero Kerke nodded and rose from his seat.

“Alright. I’ll trust you for now. In the meantime, I’ll try to find something I can do, or perhaps remember what it was, and then we’ll meet again later.”

“There’s no need to co—”

Before I could finish the sentence, the self-proclaimed Asero Kerke vanished.

Finally alone, I went into the bedroom, thinking that when I saw Angela later, I should ask her if she could install some kind of crazy-person-proofing ward on the house.

The countless organizations that existed within the Empire’s underworld.

At the very pinnacle of those organizations stood the Gerat Family.

Even the residents of the underworld shuddered at their ruthlessness; the members of the Gerat Family were notorious for showing no mercy.

Especially their boss, Dionysus Gerat, a man who made the somewhat trite expression of “making crying children stop” a reality.

A pitch-black room filled with thick cigar smoke.

Several large sacks of gold coins were presented before Dionysus, who sat on a sofa.

“Boss. This is this month’s ‘taxes.'”

“Good.”

Dionysus nodded, satisfied that it was enough, and rose to straighten his clothes.

News soon arrived that someone had arrived, and Dionysus moved towards the door.

His subordinates parted to the left and right, kneeling and pressing their foreheads to the ground.

Dionysus did the same.

After a moment, the door opened.

The Minister of the Empire’s Intelligence Bureau responded to the expression of obedience shown by the king of the Empire’s underworld with all his heart.

By stomping on his head, that is.

Ah! Jumped out of my skin.

I think I stepped on something, but what was it?

Honestly, it’s not my fault.

It’s dark enough as it is, and with a black suit on top of it, how could I possibly see?

More than that, something I’ve been wondering for a while now, I can understand the black suit, but why a black tie too?

Is someone having a funeral? Is every single day a funeral?

I was seriously considering asking him when something moved in the darkness.

“Ah, I’m always sorry to make you come so far, Your Excellency Grand Duke Barmut.”

“Just call me Director, like always.”

Too long.

“Ye, yes. Sorry… T-this way…”

Entering the dimly lit room, I was just barely able to locate the sofa and sit down.

Did he notice I was uncomfortable? Dionysus had his men light the candles.

That’s better.

Feeling a little more at ease with the light, I turned my gaze to the table in front of me.

An enormous pile of gold coins, in sacks, was stacked up like a mountain.

“Is this this month’s donation?”

“Y-yes, it is. H-how is it…?”

How is it? It’s obviously good.

Dionysus Gerat was a diligent businessman, despite being a denizen of the underworld.

Well, naturally, working in a place like this, there might be times when he has to do somewhat rough things, but still, even if it’s in the form of a donation, he’s trying to help the Empire.

It’s not that the Intelligence Agency is short on funds, but the more gold coins we have at our disposal, the better, so I gratefully receive them every month.

The donation is even bigger than last month, so business must be going well.

“Things seem to be going smoothly.”

“Yes, well, thanks to…”

“Thanks to?”

What have I even done?

“Ah, no! That’s not what I meant, it’s just, uh, a gesture of gratitude for your always warmly watching over us!”

Ah, that’s what he meant. Since he thinks of it that way, it would seem odd to deny it, so I decided to keep quiet.

Now that we’re talking about business, something came to mind.

“I’ve heard you’ve been meeting often with Maximilian Zamel, the branch manager of the Merchant Guild lately, are you planning some new venture?”

Choosing the Merchant Guild’s branch manager as a partner, I must say, was a brilliant choice.

Seems best to consult with a professional.

“Th-, that’s… ahem. I, I just have a personal acquaintance, we’ve only dined together a few times.”

“Inviting someone to the Gerhardt family estate for dinner suggests a rather close relationship, doesn’t it?”

Seemed very close indeed.

“Uh…”

“I understand you’re looking to start a business in finance?”

“Yes…”

“I’m no merchant, but I believe it’s a good venture. So long as the law is obeyed, it’s beneficial for all involved.”

“Y-, yes… Th-, the law, we, we absolutely must abide by it…”

Excellent. He even possesses outstanding ethical integrity.

Why would a man like this bother doing business in the underworld?

A niche market, perhaps?

I was mildly curious, but it seemed we’d sufficiently covered business matters.

Time to shift to casual conversation.

“It just occurred to me, your daughter has grown into quite a beautiful young woman.”

“…Excuse me?”

No parent is immune to praise of their child, they say.

Though, whether Dionysus expected me to compliment his daughter was another matter, as his eyes nearly popped from their sockets.

How harsh. I possess a certain level of tact, you know.

Truthfully, she wasn’t particularly pretty, but he donates this much to my cause, so I can certainly conjure up some pleasantries.

“Are you planning to raise her as a musician?”

“Pardon?”

“Doesn’t she currently study the violin?”

Music must be an expensive pursuit. Then again, her father is a successful businessman, so I suppose it’s manageable.

“N-, not, not particularly…”

“Around the time her lesson ends… Ah, it appears he usually picks her up himself, but sent his wife as a substitute because of me today? I apologize for the imposition.”

Dionysus shook his head so vehemently, I feared for his neck.

“A-, an apology? Absolutely not! It’s nothing! Truly!”

“Is that so? Well, I’m relieved to hear it. However…yes, I see. While I may not have children myself, I understand a parent’s concern for their daughter, in a way.”

There’s someone in my circle who is quite concerned about his daughter. A man who happens to be an Emperor.

“Always keep a close watch on your daughter. You never know how much longer you’ll have to see her.”

Children grow up so fast, don’t they? David, too, and Ellis as well.

When I see how much they’ve grown, I can’t help but have all sorts of thoughts.

“I-I shall…keep that…in mind….”

Perhaps he was envisioning the child growing up in his mind.

I decided to leave him be, so Dionysus wouldn’t feel self-conscious, as he bit his lip, seemingly to fight back tears brought on by overwhelming emotion, and instructed my men to prepare the donations.

“Then we’ll see each other again next month.”

“…Y-yes, yes….”

Curious.

They say you have to be ruthless to succeed in business, but how did such a tender-hearted man create such a remarkable enterprise?

Thinking that I couldn’t quite understand, I left the underworld behind.

“Goddamn it, goddamn it, goddamn it, goddamn it…!”

Dionysus tore at his hair.

He grabbed whatever furniture he could and threw it.

He seized the collar of the subordinate standing nearby and beat him relentlessly.

Was he truly expressing anger?

No.

He was terrified.

His current actions were nothing more than a struggle to deny his fear and escape it.

He knew better than anyone that it was all in vain.

Having driven away all his subordinates, Dionysus sat alone on the sofa and lit a cigar with a trembling hand.

He’d been a bit greedy.

It was true that he’d been just a little greedy.

‘But even so, this is going too far…!’

Frankly speaking, loan sharking was something that everyone in the underworld did, wasn’t it?

He had simply tried to expand it a little.

But the price for that was his daughter being in danger.

Even an irredeemable villain cherishes their own child.

Dionysus completely scrapped the business plan he had been newly devising.

To protect her daughter from the fiends.

“Ouch.”

Startled by the sudden pain as she washed the dishes, Celine raised her right palm to inspect it.

It was bleeding from a cut.

‘Guess I didn’t see the broken dish.’

She sighed at the uncharacteristic mistake and washed her hand under the running water. Then, she fetched the first-aid kit, applied ointment, and wrapped it with a bandage.

‘Even so, I can’t go to work like this.’

Reluctant to show the Minister her clumsy bandaged hand, Celine slipped on a pair of black gloves and gathered her two lunchboxes, heading for the Intelligence Bureau.

The Minister was already there. Secretly, she hoped he’d notice the unusual gloves, but he showed no reaction whatsoever.

‘Ugh. To want him to notice I’m hurt… even I find it unpleasant.’

Putting that aside, the throbbing in her palm was quite bothersome.

The work was progressing slowly, with each stroke of the pen bringing a sharp sting.

‘An unlucky day, it seems.’

As she sulked, lunchtime arrived.

As always, Celine went to offer the Minister the lunch she’d packed that morning, but the next moment, she couldn’t help but be startled.

The Minister had picked up his chair and moved to sit beside her.

“Mi-Minister? Why…”

“Can’t eat properly with that hand, can you?”

“Huh?”

It didn’t take long for her to understand the situation. In her heart, she let out a triumphant cheer and gave thanks for being alive.

The Incompetent Minister Wants To Retire

Despite being extremely incompetent, for some reason it’s hard to retire.

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