Chapter 178 – Reunion

Déjà vu.
It is a phenomenon in which a person sees or experiences something for the first time as if he or she has experienced it before.

After I entered the parking lot of the child welfare center where Sun-ha was taken care of, I felt such a strong sense of déjà vu.

A building that seems to have been seen somewhere, a stone floor that seems to have been seen somewhere, and an ivy that seems to have been seen somewhere.

“Oh.”

And there was a nun who seemed to have seen it somewhere.

Park your car in the parking lot and get off.
A nun who was squatting in the garden next to her and touching the grass saw me and stood up.

The traces of her years can be seen in the corner of the nun’s eyes as she opens her eyes round.
I lowered my mask and greeted the nun first.

“Hello.”

Seeing my face, the nun, who had been stiff for a moment with a surprised expression, removed her lips.

“Is it an ancestor?”

I smiled bitterly.

I was grateful that even such a nun recognized me, but I wonder if the way she spoke was too friendly.

As if we had known each other for a long time.
As if we were good friends meeting after a long time.

I hesitated, not knowing how to react, but I hardened even more at the next nun’s words.

“Seonhu, Seonhu Kim, right?”
“… Seonhu Kim?”
“Oh, that’s right, the last name changed when I went there.”

Sex can be mistaken.
The surname Jin is not very common, and the pronunciation is similar to that of Kim, so it was not strange to be mistaken.

However, the word “Last name has changed” Was added to the confident voice of the nun, which confused me.

Fragmented information gathers and connects one line.
Just like solving an equation, the values ​​of x and y are given one after the other.

But for some reason my head was refusing to give me that answer.
As if there was a safety device in my head.

“Oh. Could it be that I misunderstood the person?”

When I couldn’t answer, the nun gently lowered her head.

“Sorry. You look like the kid who was here before.”

Those words became the decisive blow.
I couldn’t hold back any longer.

“——No. That’s right, Seonhu Kim. Although she has become Jinseonhu now.”

Opens the box of memories that has been sealed for a long time.
The noise in my head clears.

Seonhu Kim.
That’s the name I gave up.
It was the name I had buried deep inside the box of memories.

Color is applied to the ‘landscape that seems to have been seen somewhere’.
Then, it transforms into a ‘landscape seen before’.

This is the institution where I stayed briefly before being adopted by her mother.
And this nun was the one who took care of me while I was in this facility.

She grew a little older and a little smaller, but there was no way she’d forgotten.

“Oh my god… Growing up like this…”

Sister looked up at me as if she was dazzling, then crossed herself and prayed.
Tears welled up in the wrinkled eyes.

“Long time no see. Sister.”

I unsealed the tightly hidden memories, but my heart was surprisingly calm.

I’m not as weak as before.
I was no longer afraid of the ghosts of the past.

“Come and sit down. Because it is sunny.”
“Yes, Sister. And you can speak comfortably.”
“… Can I?”

She and the nun sat on a bench on the side of the parking lot.
It must have been a cold day today, but after coming here, it felt strangely warm.

“It was so small… Growing up like this.”

The nun sniffed and wiped her eyes with a handkerchief, perhaps because she was filled with emotion when she saw me.

I waited for a while for the nun to calm down and brought up her story.
A story that has absolutely nothing to do with why I came here, but at the same time the most relevant.

“Sister. Maybe here… Do you have my brother too?”

Brother.
In fact, in my memory, rather than a ‘younger brother’, it remained vaguely like ‘something smaller than me who was next to me’.
I can’t remember his name, his appearance, or his gender.
I just put together the pieces of information vaguely left in my memory that I pulled out and came to the conclusion that it was a younger brother.

And if I really had a younger brother, it would be—

“Cancer. Are you saying good? There is. It looks like you haven’t returned from school yet.”

Also.
I closed my eyes tightly as if to hold back the pain that was passing through my chest.

I remember the first time I met Sunha.

A child who dangerously lifted and carried a large load that did not fit her physique.
For some reason, I was anxious and tried to help.

After that, she spilled coffee on Joo Jeong-hwan’s head, who had been arguing with Seon-ha, and helped me on the contrary.

After that incident, she became close with Seon-ha, saying hello and chatting.

When I was with Sunha, I felt oddly comfortable.
Now that I think about it, my deep consciousness must have recognized that Sunha was my younger brother.

However, Seonha suddenly quit her part-time job at a broadcasting station. She’s not even talking to me.
It was a bit sad ending for me, who thought that she became close with Seonha.

After that, even when she happened to run into her at the convenience store, Seon-ha pretended not to know me and got angry.

I didn’t understand at the time that Sunha’s attitude had changed so suddenly.
But now, there was something to point out.

“──Sister. Will she remember me?”

Even though I knew the answer, I dared to ask the nun.

“Well. Maybe she doesn’t remember? She was young before and after, but she was younger than before.”

Sunha and I are 2 years apart.
When I was 6, Sun was 4.

At the time, I did not receive a proper education at home, so my intelligence development was delayed.
The reason why I couldn’t remember Sunha was probably also affected by that.

But it would be normal for a normal 4 or 6 year old to remember.

And I threw away all of my past to live a new life as ‘Jin Seon-hu’, but she is not good.
I have been living my life as Kim Seon-ha ever since.
It wasn’t strange even if she vaguely remembered her brother’s existence.

“Ah, but I don’t know. After she gave him up for adoption, Seon-ha cried every day that her brother was gone. She got scolded for appeasing her.”

The nun said as if she missed her.

Her chest tingles.
For Sun-ha, who is only 4 years old, her older brother must have been the only thing she could rely on in the unfamiliar facility.

My older brother suddenly disappeared.
It must have been scary must have been sad
It was hard for me too because I couldn’t adapt to the unfamiliar environment, but it was probably even harder for Sun Ha, who is younger than me.

“Still, how beautiful it is that the seonhu came back as a wonderful adult. Thank God.”

Seonha quit her part-time job at a broadcasting station around the time the first interview video I filmed aired.
I remember it well because I visited Sunha to ask if he had seen the video.
And it was also then that she heard for the first time that Sun-ha had quit her job.

I felt sorry for Seon-ha, who suddenly quit without a word.
But thinking about it now, she understood why Sunha did that.

In an interview, I revealed the fact of adoption to create a story.
How good her mom has been to me, how happy she is with her new family, and how grateful I am.
I appealed hard towards the camera.

Seon-ha, who was left alone in a facility and grew up lonely, what did he think when he saw the video?
While she was a good student and even had a part-time job, she was living in the middle of the day.
However, her adopted brother boasted that she was happy in the arms of her new family, and even made her acting debut with her stepmom bag.
What did Seon-ha think when she saw her brother like that?

… It wouldn’t be strange if she felt betrayed by me.

I don’t know when Sun-ha knew that I was her older brother.
But when she saw the timing of her quitting her job at the broadcasting station, she must be sure that she knew that I was Seon-ha’s older brother.

“When she was young, it was difficult because Seonha caused her a lot of accidents. I don’t know how many times she has been called to school. After she entered high school, though, she became calm, but she seems to have a boyfriend these days, so she cares about dressing up——”

While listening to the story of Sister’s goodness, I was thinking about her goodness.

If she knew I was her brother, why wouldn’t she say good?

And his way of talking and acting as if he were dealing with a man he had a crush on.
If I had such a mind, it wouldn’t be strange if she crossed the line with Sun-ha.

Are you thinking of ruining me out of resentment?
… Probably not It’s not even a drama. Sunha is not the type to do that.

Or did he genuinely like me as a man?
Rather, it seemed believable.
Obviously, around the time I started to get close to Seonha, I played a ‘boy that a younger girl would like’.

There was a dramatic part in the process of becoming close to Seonha.
It was no wonder that an innocent schoolgirl fell in love.

Then what should I do?
If Sun-ha came to like me as a man, if she was thinking of hiding the fact that she was with her brother and sister.
How should I treat Sunha?

“Ah, goodness just arrived over there. Boy! Good!”

I saw the goodness in the direction the nun was pointing. .
As if it was cool early fall weather, she was walking through the front door of her center wearing light clothes.

I also got up from my seat following the nun.
Sun-ha, who was walking inside, noticed me and she stopped.

“Brother… ?”

Closed lips, slightly reddened eyes.
In an instant, the haggard complexion was clearly visible from a distance.

“Good.”

He is a good smart kid.
You should know what it means for me to be here.

Round and round, back
And Seon-ha suddenly started running.

“Good!”

What are you running away from?
He may not have been mentally prepared to face the existence of a ‘real brother’.
Or maybe he just ran away without thinking.

Neither of them could leave Sunha alone.
I ran at once and caught up with Seonha.

“Good.”

Grab that wrist that is trying to get away. And turn it around

Teary eyes. A face full of fear.
I knew instinctively what Sunha was afraid of.
It was the reaction of a young child when her parents caught her doing something wrong.

“Are you okay.”

I don’t know what’s good either.
I just wanted to reassure you.

“Brother…”
“Sorry. It’s okay now. Good.”

He takes a step closer and tries to gently embrace his trembling little body.
But Sunha pushed my chest with both of her hands.

“Fool! Why are you acting like an older brother now?!”

But Sunha’s arm didn’t contain enough strength to push me away.
In Sunha’s voice, the emotion of fear was stronger than anger.

I hugged Sunha again.

“No! Let go of this!”
“Sorry. I’m sorry, goodness.”
“Leaving me behind and leaving me, leaving me alone… !”

Sunha struggles and pats my back.
It didn’t hurt at all.
It was the heart that hurt, not the body.
And I was worried that Sunha’s body was cold, so I might catch a cold.

“I’m sorry, goodness. It was hard alone. It was lonely.”

Her hand tapping on my back was getting weaker and weaker.

“It’s okay now. Let’s go with my brother.”

The hand that was tapping my back stopped.
Instead, his hand hugged my back.
It was too small and fragile to live alone.

“Aang! Brother! Wow! Before and after, oppa!”

On a cold winter day.
I was reunited with my younger brother.