140 – The One Who Sees Within -2-

Yuria’s heart was crumbling.

Since the moment she saw her changed face, it had been breaking and shattering repeatedly.

When she woke up in the morning, Yuria thought she was dreaming. She never expected to experience this on the day of the ball.

As always, she greeted the lively morning.

Today, she had planned to wake up earlier than usual to prepare herself beautifully, but everything had gone awry.

Yuria felt embarrassed.

It was too embarrassing to show her changed appearance.

After calming her mind, she pondered a lot. Yuria kept repeating thoughts about what dress to wear and worrying.

Should she wear the dress Ricardo gave her?

Or should she wear the dress Rúin gave her?

Yuria knew that no matter what she wore, she would be criticized because of her ruined face.

She thought it would be different this time, but well… Yuria chose a dress with the determination to make do.

“Alright… I’ll wear this.”

After much deliberation, the chosen dress was the lime green dress Rúin had gifted her. Yuria thought that if she wore the dress Rúin had given her, he might recognize her.

She hoped that at least one person would recognize the changed her. She didn’t want to spend this ball alone again.

If Rúin recognized her, she could discuss the current issue together and perhaps find some solace for her aching heart.

Rúin said he saw the inner self.

Yuria chose the dress, trusting Rúin.

Last night, Rúin said he sees the person, not the face. Yuria believed his words that he would recognize her no matter how hideous she might become.

Instead of the pristine white dress Ricardo gave her, Yuria walked into the ballroom wearing the lime green dress Rúin had given her.

Although she regretted not wearing the dress Ricardo gave her, for now, she wanted to share and ponder the immediate problem in front of her.

The path to the ball felt long.

Students passing by glanced at her face and whispered among themselves. Laughter echoed in her ears, making her shoulders tense.

Enduring criticism that felt even colder than usual, Yuria’s steps towards the reception hall only brought to mind the worst.

Suffocating in complex thoughts, Yuria sat on a bench, pondering.

Maybe I should just not go.

Although attending the ball was a duty for a student at the academy, she wondered if they would understand her current predicament if she explained it.

However.

Yuria was a fearful person.

What if they don’t understand? What if causing another incident while under disciplinary action leads to even harsher consequences? With worry, Yuria reluctantly lifted her legs that refused to move.

One step.

Two steps.

The weight of the air between each falling step was unbearable. Nevertheless, Yuria walked on with one hope in mind.

“Ruin will recognize me,” she hoped.

Because Yuria trusted Ruin.

She believed in Ruin’s confident words and wore the dress he gifted her. She held onto the belief that he would recognize her.

Upon entering the reception hall,

Numerous criticisms were directed at Yuria.

– She’s dressed up in an ugly outfit.

– Ugh. That’s just…

– Looks like she borrowed her mom’s clothes.

Merely a change in appearance had made people’s attitudes towards her incredibly cold.

Everyone was insulting Yuria.

-What’s up. That girl.

-She’s incredibly ugly.

-I recommend being born again.

No one recognized their unjust self.

Not even close friends. Nor juniors who thanked her for getting treatment in the middle of an assignment.

Everyone was sending mocking laughs, ignoring her.

Yuria’s stomach churned.

She couldn’t understand their attitude, and at the same time, even though she could understand, her stomach churned as if insane.

The conversations of everyone sounded like a criticism of her deteriorated appearance, and she felt everyone’s gaze looking at her face.

Her head was spinning.

The churning sensation, as if she would vomit at any moment, began to overwhelm Yuria.

She thought she just needed to close her eyes and endure it once, she had comforted herself that she just needed to be strong and endure it, but once she arrived at the ball, Yuria realized that it was a comfortable thought.

Yuria bowed her head and ran towards the corner of the ballroom.

Because she wanted to live.

Because she felt like she might collapse at any moment if she received any more gazes from people. Yuria ran.

Wouldn’t her heart feel better if she hid away from people’s gazes? If she hid in a place where she couldn’t be seen, could she avoid the sounds of being ignored? Yuria was repeatedly trying to catch her breath, and as she exhaled roughly, she sighed with relief as she saw the familiar face of her friend slowly walking towards her.

“Ruine.”

Ruine was approaching her hiding spot in the corner.

Watching Ruine approach her with slow, unhurried steps, Yuria felt fortunate.

“You did well wearing the dress Ruine gave you.”

Yuria felt lucky that Ruin recognized her, even though she felt sorry for Ricardo.

She thought there was nothing more miserable than hiding alone in this vast ballroom.

She felt a bit better.

She had made more friends than last year.

Although there were still many awkward friends, Yuria was hopeful that the academy ball, where she had made friends who could laugh and chat with her, would go in the direction she had hoped for. Impressed by Ruin’s approaching steps, Yuria’s eyes reddened.

“You recognized me.”

Watching Ruin approach, Yuria clasped her hands and bowed her head.

She wanted to talk about the embarrassing and unjust things she had experienced. She wanted to talk about how her face had changed when she opened her eyes, and she wanted to find a solution.

She wanted to confide in a close friend about this frustrating feeling that she couldn’t tell others.

That’s why Yuria had high expectations for Ruin and hoped he would come quickly.

-Thud.

One step.

-Thud.

Two steps.

-Pause.

Before she knew it, seeing Ruin in front of her, Yuria called his name, hiding her choked-up emotions.

-Ruin.

-Yeah.

“Couldn’t you change your clothes?”

She was greatly disappointed.

It felt like the world was crumbling.

Ruin, who had promised to look into her inner self.

The Ruin who confidently spoke until last evening had suddenly turned cold, a sight that felt so unfamiliar to Yuria.

– Huh?

– That dress doesn’t suit you at all.

Despite praising her and insisting that it would definitely suit her, Yuria couldn’t believe Ruin’s contradictory words.

She believed.

She believed that he would recognize her.

Ruin was spitting out cold words at herself.

Yuria internally spat out a strong denial.

“You said it would suit me.”

“You insisted I wear it.”

“You told me not to wear the dress Ricardo gave me. So, I wore it… Why can’t you recognize me?”

Yuria felt a huge sense of betrayal towards the Ruin who had lied.

She was well aware of the reason why Ruin couldn’t recognize her, but still…!

She didn’t expect him to treat her so coldly.

Ruin’s coldness was shattering Yuria.

Even when she revealed her name.

Even when she tried to calm her frustrated heart by tapping her chest, Ruin’s unchanging attitude was returning with a threat that if she didn’t change into a dress immediately, he would use force.

Looking into the inside.

Even if the face changes, you said you’d recognize me.

Was it just spitting out pleasant words to hear?

With tears flowing like a fool, Yuria bowed her head and burst into tears.

Ruin sighed as he looked at himself bowing his head.

-Don’t cry.

-…

-Don’t cry because it makes me feel bad to see you ugly.

Although he had said that seeing her cry was heartbreaking, and that he would make her smile in the future, asking her to be friends with herself, Ruin was coldly repeating such sad words, forgetting about that past.

The world was dark.

It felt like the view was falling asleep hazily, and only quiet emotions were echoing in the ears.

‘Why do I have to go through this…?’

Suffering always falls on me alone.

Starting to feel disillusioned by those who boast as if they are doing well by causing suffering.

I wanted to work hard.

Was it so wrong to want to laugh with everyone? Yuria bowed her head and burst into tears.

I wanted to give up and start again.

Even the friends who betrayed me.

Those women who mock my suffering.

At that moment, the feeling of wanting to reset everything and start over from the beginning was heard.

-Kwang!

“Hmm.”

Bathed in the light of the vibrant chandelier, a man was approaching.

Always relaxed and playful.

And her friend.

Yuria was taken aback.

She never expected Ricardo to attend the ball.

Quickly, she covered her face with her hands and hid. She didn’t want Ricardo to see her in such a miserable state. She knew Ricardo wouldn’t recognize her like Rune, but she still didn’t want to show herself in that condition.

“Don’t come.”

“Don’t come…”

“Go away.”

The sound of footsteps drew closer to Yuria, who had her head bowed.

-Thud.

-Thud.

-Thud.

The footsteps, nearing, came to a halt at a certain point.

A moment when relief, a surge of sadness amidst complex emotions, flooded her.

A warm touch gently rested on her head.

It was warm.

Very much so.

It was as warm and comforting as soothing the pain I had felt until now.

A warm whisper reached the bewildered Yuri’s head.

As always, a gentle voice reached his ears.

“You look beautiful today.”

Ricardo, who no one had ever noticed, was smiling at himself.