Chapter 78 – Apocalyptic Winter (1)

When I opened my eyes again, an unfamiliar blanket was covering my body.

The coziness and warmth that I hadn’t seen in a long time was very awkward. However, before I could properly feel the discomfort, the pain came first, and soon after, Saya’s worried voice followed.

“Lope. Are you okay?”

“…”

“Lope?”

“Where should I buy this?”

“Lie down for now. It’s okay for now.”

Saya carefully put his hand on my forehead. Intoxicated with the gentle scent of forget-me-nots, he almost fell asleep again.

But I just couldn’t do it. The pressure of time, which could not be felt, kept pressing on her chest, choking her breath. So I forced myself to stand up and look around.

Of course, it was not possible to find out the identity of this unfamiliar place at once. On the outside, this place wasn’t too different from the abandoned houses where I’d stayed. The only thing that bothered me was the presence of human traces here and there. Apparently, the sounds I heard before collapsing were not hallucinations.

Suddenly, I felt someone’s breath near my wrist. When I turned my head, I saw Haru sleeping soundly in the seat next to me. Only then did I let out a slight sigh of relief.

“So where am I? Have I been asleep for a long time?”

“It’s a private house I found on my way to the port. And since I’ve only been asleep for one day, you don’t have to worry too much.”

“Mingara. But it seems we’re not the only ones in this house. Right?”

“Yeah. It’ll be fine. They don’t look like… Bad people.”

Saya slightly blurted out her words. It was because I now know how useless judging people by their impressions is in a world like this. Instead of pointing it out, I stood up, leaning against the wall.

“Ugh…!”

“Lope!”

As soon as I woke up, I felt a faint pain in my chest. At that time, it was clear that the part Rebecca had hit was wrong. But I couldn’t just sit there.

“You have to move.”

“Lope. Sit down a bit. You don’t have to be in too much of a hurry.”

“No. We don’t have time. We have to move right now.”

“Lope please…!”

Saya held onto his arm to dissuade him, but I finally grabbed my sword and strode towards the door. It was as if the compulsion of time forced my tired body and pulled me. As I staggered along like a drunk, I pushed the door open.

Then, I met eyes with two filthy old men.

“Oh…!”

“…”

They looked at me wide-eyed as if they were surprised by my sudden appearance. Well, it must have looked like a madman, dragging a sword with his hair down.

Even so, I didn’t take my bloodshot eyes to check whether I had a weapon or not. Then, as if stabbed by my eyes, the old people dropped the baskets they were holding onto the floor. And some of the acorns that were inside rolled at my feet.

At that moment, without realizing it, my strength was turbid. But the old people were still looking this way, terrified.

“That…That’s what we…”

“…”

“Therefore…”

There was a clear fear lurking in the stammered tone. No matter how much I was injured, they were old people and I was a man with a knife. It seemed that normal conversation would be impossible in this situation.

“…Grandpa? What’s wrong?”

“…!”

“Grandfather?”

Fortunately, the voice of a young boy came from the kitchen. He called out to the elderly as if it were strange, then slowly walked out the door. Only then did the old people call the boy’s name as if they were relieved.

“Aiden!”

“…”

But I couldn’t be relieved. On the contrary, the moment I heard the boy’s name, I felt like his heart sank and sank.

“What the hell is going on like that…Ah, you’re awake.”

“…”

“I didn’t think you’d be able to wake up yet. Are you feeling well?”

“Okay.”

“It’s a relief. I looked really bad until I came here. Oh, I’m Aiden. What about you?”

The boy smiled brightly and held out his hand to me. To reassure me. Or maybe it’s just that kind of personality. Either way, Aiden approached slowly, exuding an aura as warm as sunlight.

But I just couldn’t get my hands on it. Instead, he raised his head and stared at his smiling face. Maybe there are traces of Rebecca in it. I wonder if there is even a little bit of her cold impression in it. He stared at me with fear-filled eyes.

Aiden lowered his hand with an awkward expression, probably thinking that was a sign of vigilance. And then he apologized to me.

“I understand. It’s a world where you can’t trust each other. But don’t worry. We’re people who don’t even know how to fight.”

“…I know. I’m sorry. I made you worry.”

“Don’t say things like that. They say I fully understand. And from our point of view, seeing someone else after a long time is very, very nice.”

“…”

“Um…Was I too expressive? I’m sorry. I was a bit unusual.”

The more we talked, the more his good character was clearly conveyed. He could have scolded the person who saved him for what kind of attitude he had, but Aiden didn’t. Rather, he kept blaming himself for being considerate of me.

Even glanced at the old people, Aiden had a different hair color than them. Probably not family. Perhaps they, too, were strangers to Aiden.

But Rebecca had the same hair color. At that point, I couldn’t open my mouth anymore. Instead, Saya, who was fidgeting behind, stepped forward to me.

“No. Lope would have liked to say thank you too. Thanks again Aiden.”

“Thanks. In a world like this, we have to help each other. How is the other party now? He seemed pretty unwell too.”

“I think I’ll have to watch the condition for now. Thank you for caring.”

“I see. I’m not sure where you’re headed, but you can stay as long as you like and go. There’s nothing we can give you, but we have plenty of room left.”

“Yes…”

“Of course you can just stay there. If… You don’t have a good place to go.”

For the first time, there was heavy emotion in Aiden’s voice. He was glad to see his peers after a long time. And it seemed that the regret of having to send them right away was making things complicated.

Or maybe he just wants to gather more people to stick with him until his demise. In a world like this, no matter how many people you share your heart with, it’s not enough. It was natural to feel lonely.

…

It’s hard to bear. I had to express my firm refusal, but I couldn’t. In the end, Saya looked at me and struggled to open her mouth.

“Then just one day. Would it be okay if we waited one more day? You don’t have to worry about anything else. We can take care of things like meals.”

“As I said, you can do as you please. If you need anything, please let me know.”

“Thank you, Mr. Aiden.”

“…Thank you.”

I bowed my head after Saya and hurriedly turned back. Any further conversation seemed burdensome because my heart was tight.

“Excuse me…”

But then Aiden’s voice caught me. He hesitated a little, then smiled brightly.

“Nice to meet you. Lope… And Saya.”

Buya and me too. He answered with only a glance, without answering. My heart pounded and the pain intensified as if I had committed a crime. It felt like my heart would explode if I stayed like this.

No, maybe it’s not because of my mood. It’s like my heart is about to explode. It’s like being a guilty person.

The day was still asleep. Looking at the breath that continued thinly as if it would cut off at any moment, it seemed that I would not wake up for a while.

After confirming that fact, I collapsed into my seat. My mind, not my body, was so tired that I couldn’t stand up any longer. And it was the same with Saya, so she sat with me.

We hugged each other and looked at each other. It occurred to me that the same tired eyes were very similar. The saying that if you love, you become similar was realized in a very strange way.

I didn’t even smile at that fact, let alone laugh. Instead, I pressed my eyes together and took out the story inside.

“I said Aiden.”

“Huh.”

“Is it Rebecca’s son?”

“…I don’t know.”

As soon as I heard the answer, I regretted asking this question. But even so, it felt like I had to bring out the story that had festered inside. Saya looked at my crumbling figure and tried to smile.

“Let’s not think about it now, Lope. There are plenty of things to worry about.”

“Yes.”

“Rather than that, can you show me the scars? I checked the scars the day before. Show me a second.”

“I thought I saw it while sleeping, but it’s surprising.”

“…You said that. Don’t do anything while sleeping.”

“Ah.”

At that, I slightly shrugged my shoulders. I said it in passing, but I was quite concerned about that.

“I told you not to kiss me. Even then, my lips kept chapped and it was uncomfortable. Anything else is fine.”

“Are you okay with anything else?”

“Uh…No. I’ll cancel. Just don’t do anything while you’re sleeping, okay?”

“Okay. At least I won’t get caught.”

Anxiety surged at the meaningful answer. However, in that short conversation, the tension that was prevalent on Saya’s face seemed to have softened slightly.

“Then show me the scars now. It won’t be ok to see them when you’re awake.”

“You mean take off your clothes?”

“Ah…Yes. Aren’t you ashamed now? I’ve seen it a lot anyway.”

“The next kiss is to look at the body. It gets deeper as you go.”

“…But I can’t help but wonder.”

Elves are a species whose curiosity is really imprinted at the level of instinct. In the meantime, looking at Saya’s sparkling eyes, it seemed that the level was very severe.

Or maybe you just want to get out of this situation for a while. Saya awkwardly tapped me on the shoulder and brought her hand to the hem of her dress.

“Then is it okay to take it off?

“Oh no, buy it. Don’t do that.”

“Are you going to take it off now? Then I’m going to take it off by force. If you want to rebel, you can do it anywhere.”

“I’m not trying to rebel. Anyway, not yet.”

“What do you mean not yet? I…”

“Show me first. Buy.”

“Huh?”

At my words, Saya was a little taken aback and raised her head. But I held her hand with a very serious expression.

“You’re hurt too.”

“I don’t know what… You mean.”

“I can’t even see my wounds anyway. It’s because I hurt the inside. But it’s not you.”

“I am…”

“Let me see. Buy.”

“…”

“Turn your back for a moment. If it’s really okay, I want to see it with my own eyes.”

Only then did Saya shut her mouth. But she no longer shook her head. No matter how much an elf was, if she kept hiding her scars, she would one day fester.

“…Okay.”

Eventually, she gave up without saying a word. I took a deep breath and prepared my mind. Then I slowly pulled the hem of her dress up.

Then, for the first time, Saya’s pure white flesh came into my field of vision. But it never felt odd.

For that reason, there were too many scars drawn on her Saya’s skin.

“…Ah.”

“…”

The situation was worse than I thought, so I couldn’t bear to open my mouth. Her once flawless skin was now a mess with numerous cuts and bruises. The first time he saved me at the academy, the time I barely escaped from a crashing carriage, the time I dug into Hetzling’s ear hole, and the time I fought Rebecca. The traces of those countless moments were all engraved on her slender back.

Among them, when she put her hand on her latest bruise, Saya involuntarily shook her body. It seems she couldn’t stand the pain just by touching her hand. It was clear that other wounds were probably in similar condition.

One day, I thought that Saya would be okay no matter what happened. But her back, which she met belatedly, was so small and thin. She wondered why did she think that way. There is no living being in this world who is not injured.

I didn’t know how to care for her countless scars, so I ended up hugging Saya’s body as it was. Saya asked in a low voice as my rough palms dug into her soft flesh.

“How is it? Is it bad?”

“Yes. A lot.”

“It’s okay though. Compared to you, it’s nothing.”

“There’s nothing good compared to that. Injuries are injuries.”

“Thanks for noticing. But you don’t have to mind.”

“I’ll care. No matter what you say.”

I hugged Saya a little deeper. The sound of her clothes rubbing against each other filled my ears. Saya silently patted my arm, then suddenly smiled.

“Yeah. Okay, so I’ll pretend not to know that her hand goes to her chest subtly.”

“I didn’t. If you touch me, I’ll touch you properly later. Look forward to that time.”

“Don’t say anything. I’m really looking forward to it. I was wondering why humans are so obsessed with breasts.”

“I’m curious too.”

I gently kissed her behind her ear lobe as I slipped her thumb over the bottom of her chest. It tickled my ears, but I never avoided it. Saya, who enjoyed such brief happiness, carefully opened her mouth.

“…You know, Lope. I’ve been thinking about it.”

“Huh.”

“I’ve been thinking a lot since long ago. Is it really the right thing to love someone who has a shorter lifespan than me?

“What is that?”

“I’m going to give birth to a lot of children. Even after you leave, I won’t be lonely.”

“Haha…”

I laughed involuntarily, but Saya’s voice was very serious. I continued to gently tickle my lower breast and whispered in my ear.

“Then how many do you want to have? Isn’t one enough?”

“No. At least five… No, even that’s not enough. I want to have as many as I can, so that I can fill your void.”

“It wouldn’t be like that.”

“You don’t know. What a hole you pierced in my chest.”

“Indeed. I guess so.”

How do I know. Dare I can’t even imagine. I, struggling to live, committed so many sins. Especially for you to buy. Even if I give you all my life, I will not be able to give you pure joy as much as I have defiled you.

The accumulated guilt gradually became a duty and now spread to a conviction. I pulled Saya into my arms, knowing that she would hurt.

Then something cold poured out again from the bruised wound in her chest. But instead of stupidly pouring it out of her mouth, I gave her something she always wanted.

“It’s okay, buy it.”

“…”

“Are you okay.”

“I’ll protect you no matter what.”