Chapter 83 – A Fading Flame in Your Arms (4)

For a moment, Saya didn’t understand the meaning of the words and stared blankly at my face. Then I slowly turned my gaze and put the scenery I was looking at into my field of vision.

For a moment, her dark blue eyes reflected the burning city. The flame soon spread to her pale pink lips and flowed out in a trembling voice.

“No way…”

“Buy.”

“No.”

Saya shook her head faintly as if she had already anticipated what I would say. But even after seeing it, I spit out that one word at the end.

“I’ll be back soon.”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Buy.”

“Absolutely not. Got it?”

A slender hand approached before me and eagerly grabbed the hem of my clothes. The backs of her hands, which were just pure white, were full of scars from the years before she knew it.

“Look there. The smoke is still rising. That means there’s definitely some hetzling left. Even if that’s not the case, the flames will destabilize the whole city.”

“I know.”

“And I’m not even sure there’s any medicine out there. Let’s get to the port sooner rather than later. Then there might be some chance.”

“I told you to buy it. I don’t have time. I won’t last a day while I’m gone. And maybe I won’t last either.”

I shook my head softly. Then he raised his hand and pointed to the burning city.

“But it takes less than half a day to go there. And there are still many living buildings. If you go to the government office, there must be medicine in the underground facility.”

“No. Absolutely no. It’s too dangerous.”

“It’ll be fine, buy it. They’re preoccupied with their eyes right now…”

“No Lope!”

Eventually, Saya let out a growl and thrust her face toward me. Her lips trembled uncontrollably, and there was even a little anger. But I said it in a quiet voice without any agitation.

“But you can’t just give up like this.”

“That…”

“Is it okay if I leave you alone for a day?”

“That’s… So…”

…

“It’s not like that… It’s not Lope…”

A deep sigh pierced the endlessly falling snowflakes and landed on the floor. When I came to my senses, the whole world was locked in cold eyes. The stinging white powder keeps being sprinkled over old wounds, as if it were already salting my corpse.

Could it be that wishing for me to die is the wish of this world? I’m starting to think that way now. As I looked up at the sky as if I had been liberated, pure white malice embracing the cold chill and scattered slowly. On my face. On the nape of the day. And, Saya’s bright yellow hair.

By the time the pouring snow turned into a stream and flowed to the tip of his chin, Saya shook his head once more.

“I can’t even think about it. It’s too dangerous, Lope.”

“It’ll be fine. Trust me, buy it.”

“No, I’d rather go. It’s much faster that way. I can still move my legs and my body is fine.”

“…”

“Okay, then that’s fine. Just tell me where to go, Lope. I’ll be right back.”

Saya raised her head, her eyes widening for the first time. Her face, much haggard compared to when they first met on the island, dug into her chest. But I gently shook her head at her.

“No, buy it. You have to protect the day here.”

“It’s fine as long as you’re there. If it’s me, I can come and go really quickly, so I just…”

“I don’t have the confidence to do that.”

“…”

“…I don’t have the confidence to buy it.”

I slowly raised my hand and looked at the inserted gauntlet. Tiny snow crystals glistened on the gray metal surface. But when I threw it away, my charred hand was revealed. The mana was robbed and the bones were shattered, causing the skin to lose its luster and become necrotic.

Looking at this, it’s really messed up. At least I could still move my fingers and feel them. As soon as Saya saw it, she bit her lip.

“With these hands, I won’t be able to deal with even a single mouse. I don’t even have the strength to carry Haru.”

“But…”

“And how to open the government office underground facility, only I know. It’s too complicated to explain now.”

“You just have to let me know…”

“It’s hard to tell. Then buy it.”

My hand in the snow was so cold that I grabbed Saya’s hand without realizing it. Sensing her warmth, I deliberately raised the corner of her mouth. And while maintaining that smile, he quietly opened his mouth.

“If I don’t come, you will.”

“Don’t do it.”

“You are the only one.”

“Please don’t do that.”

“Buy it…”

“That’s what you meant to say after all!”

Tears that she had been holding back until the end flowed from Saya’s eyes. She shook her head vigorously and shook her hand away from me.

“In the end, that’s what I wanted to say. That’s it, so I’ll survive alone!”

“It’s not like that.”

“What’s wrong! Do you think I’m stupid? You’re going to die right now. You’re going to die alone, leaving me alone! Am I wrong?”

“I’m not going to die.”

“Then why are you saying that? Why are you all leaving me alone? Mom, Haru, and you too! What the hell!”

“…”

“Why…Why did you leave me alone… You said everyone would leave in the end…”

Saya, who was vomiting out her emotions violently, sighed and couldn’t bear to continue her words. Her face, filled with indescribable emotion, turned bright red as if she were about to explode at any moment. Soon after, she couldn’t even look at me and closed her eyes, shedding thick tears.

“Running is such a slow subject…”

“…”

“Why…Everyone wants to leave faster than me…”

…

“Buy.”

I grabbed Saya’s face as she was about to collapse with both of her hands. Stained by her tears, stained by white snow. Although he was visibly haggard, he still had rabbit-like eyes. Still she was too pretty for me to handle.

“I don’t intend to die yet.”

“Lie.”

“I’ll be back really soon.”

“I won’t let you go.”

“Trust me just this one more time.”

“I’ll never let you go…”

With a rustling sound, the strength in her hand that gripped her arm went into it. It seemed like I wouldn’t really let go.

So I kissed Saya’s light pink lips to unlock it. As their stinging lips scraped each other’s flesh, a faint pain pierced them like an awl.

A kiss in the middle of winter delivered warmth warmer than a bonfire. Even so, Saya pushed my face away from her without even closing her eyes.

“No.”

“Did you finally hate me?”

“Huh.”

“Then will you send it?”

“That’s not allowed.”

“Buy.”

As I opened my mouth, I opened my mouth again. A cold hand pushed me away this time, but it was quite weak. I grabbed Saya’s brittle hair and tilted her head again.

“Please don’t do this, Lope.”

“There is no way.”

“There’s always a way…”

“And that’s it.”

“Town…”

A kiss for every word. I kissed her cold cheeks and kissed her. His hands were still pushing my breasts, but their strength gradually weakened and the kissing time got longer.

Meanwhile, the snow continued to fall over our heads. Saya, who succumbed to the pure white violence, finally accepted my lips with her eyes closed. The tears that flowed down again wet my chin and gave me hot heat. We were holding onto each other for a long time because we felt like we would miss this touch someday.

Maybe this moment will be the last happy time.

Before that thought crossed my mind, I parted my lips.

“Haa… Black…”

“Buy.”

As soon as their lips parted, Saya shook his shoulders impatiently. I couldn’t caress her with her, my, her, her cold hands, but I still somehow raised her hands and touched her cheeks.

“I won’t say any more clichés.”

“…”

“I won’t say anything weird because this won’t be the end.”

“…”

“But for some reason, I don’t think I’ve ever said this before. Let me just say this.”

Before we knew it, snow was piled up all around us. There was no more time to delay. So I hugged Saya one last time and whispered in a small voice so only she could hear.

“I love you. Saya.”

“I am…”

“Then I’ll go.”

“Rope…!”

Compared to the waiting time, the moment of confession was too short. Saya couldn’t let go of my hand until the end and called me with a desperate voice.

But I let go of that hand and turned around behind her. And I started walking towards the city covered in black smoke.

“Haaa…”

Each of my small steps were stamped into the field of snow that fell like flower petals. Perhaps because of the heat of the flames that covered the sky, as soon as they were stepped on, their eyes turned into cold tears and seeped into the brown earth.

And an unknown drop of water fell on my face. Perhaps the snow that seeps through your hair is melting.

Or, the tears of Saya buried on both cheeks are now flowing down.

I thought it was the latter and wet her hands with the water. For some reason, it felt like warmth wrapped around my body.

Still, the weather was harsh and the hatchlings’ fires did not warm the air sufficiently. In that cold, my mind was slowly paralyzed, and my injured limbs kept creaking like a broken doll.

Maybe I’ll really fall down like this. If that happens, it will be a very lonely death. I will fall alone in the snow and slowly freeze to death.

It was only then that I realized that I was alone for the first time since leaving the island. I’ve never been alone before. It was a strange feeling. I even felt as if I was absent from the academy without permission and came out on my own.

It’s so strange to feel such a strange feeling now. But it was never pleasant. So I started running slowly to get out of this moment.

“Haha…”

Even though I was running at a really slow pace, I was quickly short of breath and felt a pain in my chest. As I was breathing heavily, tears naturally flowed, and as my vision gradually blurred, the accident began to stop.

Still I can’t stop I had to somehow move my broken limbs to reach it. Because I finally realized why I had to live. Because now I know who to live for.

The wish that I wished for someday, that the world would perish.

It was only now that I realized what a stupid wish it was.

With that thought in mind, I started to run faster.

The image of the collapsed city finally began to appear in front of my eyes as I ran endlessly. It was still a bit far, but it was steadily getting closer nonetheless.

As I ran with my heart about to break, I didn’t want the medicine inside. Because there will be because it is indispensable So I started making other wishes instead.

Oh God.

Give me just one more day.

I hoped so and threw myself into the city where the hatchlings were glowing. The white smoke billowing behind me quietly enveloped my steps.